Filial Piety
by Rosabell
Summary: Semi-AU.Obi-Wan retreats to Tatooine after Vader's turn,heart grieving and shattered.He is visited by a hallucination that turns out to be much more, from whom he learns the truth about his destiny and the galaxy's.
1. Chapter One

**Disclaimer: This is a fanfic of the products of LucasArts. It is therefore non-profit and nothing belongs to me except the plot and how I've portrayed it. This applies to all chapters.**

Filial Piety

Chapter One

Anakin had described the aridness of Tatooine in great detail, clarifying with no uncertain terms his sheer distaste for the planet. The last time Obi-Wan had been here, he had remained on the ship as he watched Qui-Gon, R2D2, Queen Amidala, and Jar Jar trek off into the desert landscape. Four had gone, five came back, with the latter a child that would make Obi-Wan's entire world like a blooming star, and shred it just as brilliantly. It was almost like a fairytale, too good to be true, that from the edges of the galaxy where nothing grew, Obi-Wan should find something, someone, that would mean more to him than anything he knew. The last parting gift from Qui-Gon.

He never viewed Tatooine as the ball of dust Anakin always thought it was, and now, in his dry, worn hut surrounded by the stretches of sand the boy had so despised, Obi-Wan still could not hate the place. It was lonely and barren and quiet, like death, and if his fate could be depicted by a landscape, this would be it. In a way it was almost therapeutic, coming to the world where Anakin had been innocent and young, untarnished by the Dark Side, or the stress and fears of war. He could almost believe he was starting over, that he had not made all the mistakes he had made, that this time, it will be _different_.

The twin suns were rising, though the chill of the desert lingered, and Obi-Wan watched the sands lighten with the sky. He had spent the night outside, staring into the darkness, because every time he tried to sleep, he saw fire under his eyelids and smelled the stench of sulfur and volcanic ash. Anakin's cry of loathing echoed in his mind, the declaration of hatred an almost animalistic shriek. The air was cold in his nostrils and he shuddered under his cloak, grasping for the Force that gave him no comfort. He hurt, deep in his core, the pain so profound that it only refilled itself when he tried to release it as a Jedi should. His head hurt, his heart, his throat, from restraining the sobs that seemed to push at his vocal cords, his eyes from holding back tears, his bones from a lifetime of failure.

One week, since he arrived. One week since giving Luke to the Lars family. One week since he established a small shelter for himself and stood, for the first time, in the poor, worn room, so different from the scant yet pristine furnishings at the Temple. How strangely time passes, one when is grieving. It seemed like an eternity since he first set foot on this planet, and yet time seemed to have stood still. Perhaps this was what was meant when life loses all meaning. He found himself envying Padmé, for being able to release her responsibilities and her burdens and depart for the afterlife. He even found himself envying the dead Jedi, who would never know the shambles the Order had been reduced to, and the cause…the cause…

The twin suns shimmered as they rose, dispelling the night's cold rapidly. With a weary sigh, Obi-Wan drew himself tight and stood. He went inside to the cool of his hut, still cold from the night, half thinking he should prepare some breakfast for himself, or go through some katas, even meditation, but morning rituals had lost all meaning for him. He had no appetite at all, and no will left to be a good Jedi. Surely he could afford to be lax about his discipline. What was there to defend, around here? Vader would never look for Luke in this place. He could sit quietly and only eat when he was in danger of true malnourishment, but as it was, Luke was in no immediate danger, and the child was too young to get into much trouble. Obi-Wan was not needed, for now.

A flicker of blue caught his eyes for a moment. Obi-Wan stared, feeling lost and confused, though he was unafraid. Ever since he came to this hut, the vision of Anakin kept showing up at odd moments. The young man looked as if he had never been burnt, his eyes as crystal blue as it was before he turned, dressed in the robes of the Jedi he had slaughtered. There was always an aura of light blue surrounding the youth, something that baffled Obi-Wan, but it was a reminder that the illusion was just that and nothing more. This Anakin never remained long, nor did he ever speak, but he watched Obi-Wan intently, as if studying him. Obi-Wan had not slept in more than a week, so it was easy to explain why he kept thinking he saw Anakin in his home.

_Sooner or later,_ Obi-Wan thought, _I am going to hear voices._

As if on cue, the vision spoke.

"You do need to eat, you know."

Of all the things he anticipated the hallucination to say, this rebuke, given in a voice so like Anakin's, caught him off guard. He sounded so real.

"You've lost weight," The illusion went on to say.

Obi-Wan turned away and sat down near the window. Perhaps if he ignored the hallucination, it will go away.

"I'm not a hallucination."

The Jedi Master merely pulled his cloak around him. He really should take it off, but having it on made him feel safer, somehow, as if it were shielding him from reality.

He heard a sigh, and then the vision sat down across from him. For a moment they stared at each other.

Fine, if this figment of his imagination will not go away, Obi-Wan might as well indulge it.

"I was going to be a farmer."

Anakin did not react. Then again, this was hardly news to Obi-Wan, so it would probably not be surprising to something his own mind conjured up.

"I was nearing my thirteenth birthday. Four weeks left, before they send me to Bandomeer. I was promising, at first, good at the lightsaber, but no one wanted me, until Qui-Gon came. Even then, he didn't want me—he said I was too angry, and it was better not to train me." He rubbed his face with his hands. "I didn't believe him. I was so determined to be a Jedi…but I guess everyone back then saw what I didn't see. They knew I wouldn't be a good Jedi and I would be better off at Agri-Corps. I guess they just didn't realize how exactly I would fail them."

Anakin folded his arms. "Awarding you a Council seat is a strange way of saying you're not a good Jedi, Master."

Obi-Wan blinked. He had not expected this response, and had no rebuttal for it.

"I told you," Anakin said with that familiar frustrated tone, "I'm not a hallucination. I can't help you if you're going to doubt everything I do, and by the Force, I know I deserve it, but can't you just make it easier like you always do?" He quirked his lips slightly in a slight smirk, eyes glinting in humor.

The sight sent a pang deep into his heart, and Obi-Wan abruptly stood, turning away from Anakin's glowing form. He was so tired and the new agony made him dizzy and sick.

"Well, patience was never one of my virtues," He heard Anakin grumble. "But Obi-Wan, I'm on a time limit here. The sooner you let me help you, the less time we'd have to waste going back and forth like this."

He reached to the Force for some guidance, but though it flooded him with the light as it always had, he gained no clarity, and Anakin remained standing in the same room.

_Anakin is gone. Anakin is gone. He was killed by Vader and now he's gone._

"Master?" Anakin hovered near, but a telling hint that he was not real showed in the way he deftly avoided touching Obi-Wan, when the real Anakin would have laid a hand on his arm at this point. "You should go lie down."

All things aside, this was not a bad suggestion, and Obi-Wan went without thanking the vision. True, he should be up now; it was morning after all, but there was nothing else for him to do, and he felt truly ill. Anakin's glowiing form did not go away, but he did not speak, and Obi-Wan did not acknowledge him further.

ooo

Anakin stopped talking to him for a while, though he kept appearing, while Obi-Wan finally mustered the energy to cook what meager rations he had, when Obi-Wan tried in vain to meditate, and when Obi-Wan sat outside watching the desert creatures dance across the sands in the shadows of the night when he could not sleep. After a week, the blue-ish, almost holographic image spoke again, and Obi-Wan could not summon the will to continue ignoring him.

"You should visit my son," Said the ghost of the Jedi Knight long gone, "Just because my stepbrother said no, doesn't mean you have to listen to him."

It was just like Anakin, really.

"You always did what you wanted," Obi-Wan sighed, "I indulged you too much. Maybe that was where I went wrong."

"What are you talking about?"

"Not all of us are willing to ignore other people's wishes for our own," He found himself snapping, and raised a hand to cover his face. "I guess I didn't teach you that well enough. I suppose as long as you were happy, I didn't really care. Didn't think you would turn into a mass murderer." What was he even doing? "Why am I talking to you?"

"Because you had something to say?" Anakin folded his hands in front of him. He looked incredulous. "You blame yourself for all of this?"

That question did not warrant a response. His hallucination ought to know perfectly well, since Obi-Wan had created it himself.

"I tried. Too hard." Obi-Wan sighed. "Went about it all wrong. It was either that, or not enough…tried too hard to be selected as a padawan," He was cleaning the table of sand, wiping the grains off to the floor. Perhaps there was no harm in murmuring this information out loud. There was no one to hear it but himself, and perhaps if he said this out loud, the dead weight in his heart will lift, even a little, and he could concentrate on young Luke Skywalker. "Tried too hard, was deemed 'too angry'." Flashes of memory assaulted him, his sheer desperation at the match, Bruck Chun's shocked face when Obi-Wan's lightsaber lined against his neck. Won the battle, lost the war, so they say. Qui-Gon had looked at him with dark eyes, and Obi-Wan watched as he walked away, hope turning to ash in his mouth. "Tried too hard to do the right thing," Qui-Gon's furious expression when Obi-Wan declared his intentions to stay with the Young, Cerasi's still, battered body, and the eternal knowledge that Obi-Wan had failed her, "And then, there's not trying hard enough; he was willing to throw me away for you, did you know that?" Ready for the trials…not hours before, Qui-Gon had said he still had much to learn and all of the sudden he was ready for the trials, conveniently timed so that the young desert boy could take his place. "Didn't try hard enough to cross the Force barriers in time…" Winning a meaningless battle against the Sith, too little, too late, as Qui-Gon lay dying in his arms.

"Small wonder I failed you too," He finished, not looking at the vision.

Live in the moment, Qui-Gon always told him. It was difficult to, however, when the past kept pressing, and the present was so bleak and empty. No missions, no war, for the war was already lost, and miles upon miles of endless desert and the harsh sky above.

"Master," Anakin's voice startled him out of another one of his reveries, and Obi-Wan, in a moment of weakness, looked up at his old padawan's eyes. They looked very real, glistening and blue, and had the blue light not shone around him like an aura, the Jedi Master would have believed his student was really there in the flesh.

"Master, I want you to indulge me for now. Will you do that?"

He sounded so determined, like whenever he was trying to convince Obi-Wan to allow him to perform some reckless enterprise.

Indulge a hallucination. Though seriously, what else was Obi-Wan to do?

"I want you to go to Mos Eisley," Anakin pressed, "Tomorrow afternoon. Will you do that?"

"Sure." Why not? He could go refamiliarize himself with the site. He had a feeling it would be important to know the area.

"I want you to buy enough supplies to last you for two weeks, without stepping a foot outside your house. Can you do that?"

Obi-Wan froze. What an odd thing to say from a hallucination. His eyelids ached and felt heavy and he rubbed them, tired.

"Why?" He murmured, wondering if he was going insane. He felt like his mind was in a fog. His entire body hurt.

"Well, the immediate reason is because there's a sandstorm coming up that will absolutely bury your cute little hut. The long term reason is because I actually want you to believe what I say in the future, instead of constantly brushing me off as a figment of your imagination. You're usually a lot quicker on the uptake than this, Master, but I'll let you go on this one because, all things considered," Anakin then laughed a little, though it sounded very morose, "I'm not sure I'd be willing to believe it either, put myself out like that. But I'm here for you, even if _I'm_ not."

None of this was making any sense, but as Obi-Wan turned away to collect himself, Anakin took that opportunity to disappear. When the master glanced back, his padawan was gone, and it was just him in the house and miles and miles of empty desert.

ooo

Mos Eisley was like the lower levels of Coruscant, its visitors a slimy, villainous bunch eager to pickpocket and trick their way into wealth. Obi-Wan brushed off the numerous attempts without much motivation. He was hardly aware of their attacks, though he focused on the layout of the town. There was a cantina, which could be useful for overhearing news from smugglers and travelers. Perhaps sometime in the future, he will go there for a drink and listen to how the rebellion was faring. He noted the people, minding their own business and yet wary of the world around them. Come noon, people will withdraw to the shelter of the shade, but for now the suns were shining brightly, and the air was hot and dry. Clicks and garbles echoed as folks bartered for vital yet scarce resources, and the Force thrummed with the activity. For all the hostile barren wastes this planet was made of, the deserts were hardly lifeless.

He bought two weeks of supplies, not because he actually believed the hallucination foretold the coming storm, but because he did not feel like coming here too often. Unlike before, there was no Temple to return to after a hard day of dealing with scum and criminals. There was only the solitude of his exile.

As the local vendor took stock of his purchase, Obi-Wan allowed himself to reminisce on all the Jedi who were lost. Bant, Mace, Ki-Adi-Mundi, the young crechlings, one moment there, the next moment, cut down like vermin. He snapped out of his reverie when the vendor called for him to pay, which he did with awkward movements. His limbs ached and his fingers refused to move. How his head pounded.

"Are you alright, sir?" Asked the vendor.

"I'm fine," Obi-Wan turned away.

ooo

The sandstorm picked up that night.

Obi-Wan listened to it roar outside, an unusual feeling in his chest. He was strong in the Unifying Force, but his premonitions were always visions and feelings. Never did he receive such a direct forecast as that. The lights flickered in his hut as sand scratched outside the walls.

Still, sandstorms were common on Tatooine. They usually last a few hours, at most a day. There were no trees, after all, to block the wind's passage or hold the ground together.

"You'll be nice and cozy here for about two weeks," Anakin's voice cut through the silence. "Why did you bring my son to the Lars family?"

Obi-Wan's head hurt. He ignored the phantom and picked up a broom to sweep the floor, for lack of anything better to do. A Jedi Master, reduced to housework. Qui-Gon would think this was funny, if he could get over the sheer horror of the Great Jedi Purge.

Anakin was relentless. "You could raise him yourself, you know. I would have wanted that. Sith, I _do_. Whatever part of me is left."

Obi-Wan went on sweeping.

"Luke would make good company. You need company when sandstorms last two weeks. I remember sandstorms with my mother. Getting stuck inside sucked; couldn't go out and play, but it also felt really good if Mom was there, knowing that it's all wretched outside but we were nice and safe inside, the two of us, and there was no work to do because there's no way anyone could send slaves out to work. I get to work on Threepio and Mom would be in the next room, sewing. Honestly, it would be better than waiting until Luke is pretty much twenty years old, at the last minute when Vader sends Imperials barging into the Lars home like last time. Even if it turned out alright, that was close."

Obi-Wan honestly had no idea what Anakin was talking about, but he did not care. Anakin went on talking, and it was funny how even as a hallucination, he still had no consideration for his old master's preferences. Always doing what he wanted, and though Obi-Wan knew this was hardly commendable, part of him that he loathed still did not mind this at all. If Anakin was happy, so was he, and that was how it always had been, Jedi attachment or not. He stopped sweeping to rest his forehead against the tip of the broom in order to recollect himself. There was a painful swelling in his chest, separate from his thoughts, that seemed to push outwards and upwards, to his throat and nose and eyes.

"And then you didn't even finish training him," Anakin went on, "You left that job to Yoda, who by the way, was far closer to the end of his days than you were. Even if your hair was as white as his. If anything I would have liked to cut Yoda in half instead…or try. I think he's a bit too short to be cut _further_ in half, but I never liked Yoda, respect or not."

No, Anakin never liked Yoda. He never liked anyone in the Jedi Order, really. Obi-Wan had hoped that Anakin would like his master, at least, but in the end he had grouped Obi-Wan along with everyone else. He dropped the broom, leaving it there, and finally turned to face his hallucination _again._

"I really don't need this right now," He found himself laughing bitterly at how ridiculous he was being, but it was either that or burst into tears, and he was _not _going to burst into tears, even if there was no one around to see. No weeping. It was the principle of the thing. "My world has ended, my life has ended, I'm staying in order to ensure that Luke and Leia fulfill what they must fulfill to save the galaxy, but I _really _don't need commentary while I'm trying really hard not to escape." Then it clicked. "The Force is punishing me. It all makes sense. You're my punishment."

"What?" Anakin looked truly horrified. "This is not fair. I am trying to help. Look, if you have Luke here, it would be annoying, perhaps—I mean, he's _my _son, and all kids are annoying, but Master, you don't have to become a hermit. Not like this. Look, I'm asking you to raise Luke, not just watch over him. He can help you as much as you help him. Helped _me_."

What kind of insanity was his mind spouting out now?

"I failed you," Obi-Wan said flatly, wondering how many times the Force or his brain would force him to utter these words out loud. "I failed you and I'd fail him."

"You didn't fail me," Anakin sulked, folding his arms, "If anything, I failed you. And judging from your life, it's like the Force planted you here specifically so that other people could fail you—or maybe the Force itself failed you. But you have to understand…what happened, it was all in the design. There was nothing you could have done to prevent it, and if anything, you made the best possible outcome…possible."

This was sounding like a lot of nonsense, and his head hurt so much he was feeling nauseous again. Or maybe he was so nauseous his head was hurting…he could no longer make sense of anything.

"Master, you should sit down."

"Don't call me that," Obi-Wan beseeched, his voice cracking as a lone sob broke through his defenses. Anakin's cry of hate still echoed in his mind, and it was a perverse reminder of a time when Obi-Wan thought Anakin cared for him. "I am not your master, and have not been for some time now."

"You will always be my master," Anakin returned, "Whatever Vader has to say. Sit down, Master. I can't help you," He lifted his hands, "Being incorporeal kind of hinders things like that."

Obi-Wan did sit down, and Anakin appeared to take a seat across from him. It was foolish to entertain the vision as much as he did, but perhaps solitude does have its necessities, and Obi-Wan felt so alone, _so _alone…

"Did any of it mean anything?" He asked the vision.

"Any of what?"

He blinked a little at this. He had asked the question in a meaningful tone. Why would the hallucination act like he did not know what Obi-Wan referred to?

"Our time together. You once said I was the closest thing you had to a father." It felt odd to echo the words Anakin once said. Obi-Wan had not acknowledged them as well as he should have at the time. Perhaps that was what turned Anakin against him? Did Obi-Wan's lack of reaction translate into a rejection? "Did you mean it?"

Anakin was thoughtfully quiet, something that alarmed Obi-Wan, because he was expecting the figment of his imagination to simply answer, "No, of course not," And this Anakin was behaving oddly. Like…an independent being whose reactions were unpredictable to Obi-Wan.

"I was twenty-two years old, Master," Anakin finally said. "And I thought you would threaten my life with Padmé. I've been doing a lot of observing, and you know what I've found? That all sons forget their parents when they're in love and feel their parents are threatening their partners. They all do and say hurtful things, but I guess as Jedi, with the Force, our fallouts tend to be more dramatic." He shifted a little, though his eyes remained on Obi-Wan. "That didn't mean I ever stopped thinking of you as a father, even when I was hating your guts. Though for a long time I hated what you did to me at Mustafar, but part of me loved you, all the same. If I really thought so little of you, I would not be scouting the galaxy for your whereabouts like this, in order to kill you personally."

Obi-Wan released a weeping laugh, turning his head away. The sandstorm continued to blow outside, the grains scratching against the hut.

"Master," Anakin insisted, "I wanted to kill you in a duel. That is…was…the most merciful thing I could have done. It would make you die nobly, and quick. Even as Vader, I had considered that."

Obi-Wan rested his head against his hand, shutting his eyes. "Why are you talking in past tense?" He asked. It was a strange quirk about this hallucination he could not put his finger on.

"I'm from the future."

Obi-Wan opened his eyes and looked at Anakin. "What?"

The phantom looked sheepish. "Well, I'm a _ghost_ from the future…because I died…right. I guess there really is no better way than the direct way, not if I don't want to take years helping you lead up to it. But I am a Force ghost, just like Qui-Gon Jinn, who was the one who taught us how to be Force ghosts, by the way."

"Qui-Gon?" Obi-Wan blinked blearily, his voice rasping.

"You know the Shaman of Whills? Qui-Gon learned how to retain his conscience in the Force. He taught that to Yoda, or is teaching that to Yoda right now, and originally Yoda would show you how to communicate with him; you normally would need to learn how, meditation tricks and all that, but I'm the Chosen One and all…I broke the rules, you know me, in order to see my dear old master first."

"I have no idea what you're saying."

"Will you listen to me if I tell you the whole story?"

A great lump of sand smashed into the side of the hut outside. "I have nothing else to do."

"That's true." Anakin folded his hands. Then he uttered a Huttese curse, startling Obi-Wan.

"Sorry," Said the phantom, "I have to go. But I'll be back. You stay right here and know that I'll be back, alright Master?"

When Obi-Wan blinked, Anakin was gone.

Stay right here. The sandstorm still whirled outside. Honestly, where in the name of the Force would Obi-Wan go?


	2. Chapter Two

Filial Piety

Chapter Two

_Anakin watched the nine-year-old Obi-Wan laugh with his four friends. The boy was so energetic and carefree, it was almost painful to look at him. So different from the Obi-Wan Anakin knew. This Obi-Wan was whole, healthy and young, completely unaware of the fate that awaited him. Even at nine years, the child had a grace about his movements, and his Force presence was strong and bright. He was like a small star, not the biggest nor the most surrounded by planets, but beautiful nonetheless._

_The Jedi younglings were oblivious to the Force spirit observing them, continuing their conversation with innocent voices ringing like bells. The Room of a Thousand Fountains tinkled with the sound of running water, and the smell of flora perfumed the gardens, surrounding the children in a world of art._

_But Anakin could not bring himself to appreciate the visage. He was waiting with dread, staring anxiously at the children, and then at the door, afraid to miss even a vital millisecond. Obi-Wan laughed again, and Bant was levitating a rock to him. The Force swirled at her call, and Anakin felt Obi-Wan's aura shimmer as he used the Force to hover a small stone to collide with hers._

_In a few minutes, Qui-Gon Jinn was going to walk through those doors. He was going to walk through those doors and see Obi-Wan, and he will have an instant connection with him. And then he will talk to the boy, get to know him, and within a year's time, take Obi-Wan as his padawan._

_This must not happen. And yet, despite everything Anakin did, it was. He could not divert Qui-Gon from his destination, no matter how urgent his Force suggestions were, and he could not get the younglings out of the gardens in time because they were not trained enough to understand his message.  
_

_The seconds ticked by, long and arduous to Anakin's perception, and he could sense Qui-Gon's presence drawing closer. The Jedi Master was coming to meditate. Anakin looked to the children. Would they please stop talking? If Qui-Gon does not hear Obi-Wan's innocent laughter, then he might not come to investigate, and the two will not meet. But Obi-Wan was laughing. He was falling to his side in a fit of giggles, clutching his little stomach. Jedi were taught to release their emotions into the Force, but Obi-Wan was not trained enough to do so for his humor. His friends were laughing with him, as one of them blushed beet red, and protested that all of them were heartless and inhumane._

_Anakin squeezed his fist. Would they be quiet? Once again, he tried to will the passage of events, but he was one lone spirit against the mighty Force, and his wishes remained unfulfilled. The children chattered on, and the hour drew close—  
_

_And then Qui-Gon Jinn walked in._

_Anakin sighed, running his phantom fingers through his hair in a habitual gesture he had picked up again when he died. He growled in frustration as Qui-Gon turned at Obi-Wan's giggles, and diverted from his original path to seek the initiates. He gritted his teeth as he watched Qui-Gon loom over the younglings, Obi-Wan sit up in alarm, and stare at the tall man in awe and dismay._

_"Hello, young ones."_

_"Hello, Master."_

_"What were you all laughing about?" The Jedi Master smiled. His attention was mostly directed at Obi-Wan, as Anakin knew it would, and Obi-Wan stuttered shyly._

_"We were teasing Garen…"_

_Another failure. The Force was determined to keep Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan together. And why not? Obi-Wan was such a bright presence. He had caught the attention of many masters the first time around, but Qui-Gon had been the first, and Obi-Wan had bonded with him. The boy had chosen Qui-Gon, not the other way around. And of course, Obi-Wan was strong in the Unifying Force, so it made sense that his choice also had much to do with the Force's very will._

_Anakin turned away, and disappeared from the gardens. _

_ooo  
_

_"Didn't work?" A voice suddenly asked._

_Anakin groaned. "No."_

_"Are you sure you have to cut through at _this _point in time?"_

_"No!" Anakin folded his arms. "But this was the timepoint where Obi-Wan meets Qui-Gon for the first time, and they have that instant connection. They are both strong in the Force, so I can't blind them. The only thing I could do was prevent their meeting, but even that is proving to be…" He sighed. "I tried sending Qui-Gon on a mission, sending Obi-Wan to the healing wing, even get another master to select Obi-Wan, but none of it is working. His potential doesn't blossom until he is nine years old, and after that, in every scenario, he is with Qui-Gon Jinn!"_

_Silence fell, as Anakin fumed. This was ridiculous. He was the Force. There was a reason why the Jedi Code stated that there was no death. Upon his passing, he had joined the Force, become part of its will. As such, he should be able to influence it, and as the Chosen One, his word should carry more weight…_

_So why was this so impossible?  
_

_"Are you sure you can't send him to Bandomeer _with _Qui-Gon?"_

_"I can, but it wouldn't work." Anakin shook his head. "Qui-Gon is too protective of Obi-Wan. I can't shut it down with Qui-Gon constantly hovering over him. Once they form a bond…going to Bandomeer wouldn't be of any use. They're too in tune with each other, and Qui-Gon would not let Obi-Wan in harm's way whatsoever."_

_He paced back and forth, despite the fact that pacing was hardly practical in his incorporeal form._

_"This is ridiculous."  
_

_"We have time."_

_Anakin nodded. They did have time. As spirits, they could travel back to any point in time and intervene on events. The only rule was that they could only talk to people who could hear them, they could not change events that other spirits have altered already, and they could not speak to their living selves._

_"We don't have any ideas, though." He looked at his companion. "I don't know what to do."_

_"What if you speak to Yoda? Perhaps Yoda can keep the two apart until the right time."_

_"The Jedi send their younglings off to one of the service corps when they are thirteen years old and still not selected. Even if I do have Yoda keep Qui-Gon away from Obi-Wan, as soon as both of them are sent to Bandomeer, Qui-Gon will adopt the boy, and we are back where we started."_

_"What if Qui-Gon is not sent to Bandomeer?"_

_"Then Obi-Wan will die! That's even worse!"_

_"Calm down." The other spirit folded her arms. "We will think of something, Anakin."_

_Anakin said nothing._

_"I can kill Asajj Ventress. Prevent her from ever being trained."_

_"You know that's not the root of the problem."_

_"Well I'll kill the kidnapper."_

_"There will always be someone else, something else. I could get hit by a speeder. I could have a stroke. And you know that Obi-Wan will be there saving me, and that is all it takes to set it off."_

_Anakin grabbed his head. "The Dark Side doesn't have any answers, the Light Side doesn't have any answers, I'm the krethin' Chosen One and I can't do _anything_!"_

_"Yes you can. You just don't know how, yet. We have to brainstorm a little more."_

_"What's the use? We won't come up with anything."_

_"Ani."_

_Anakin looked up at her, feeling like that lost little boy from Tatooine, new to the galaxy, new to the stars, the ship that bore him away from home, the cold climate of its interior and the vast darkness of hyperspace._

_"We have time, Ani."_

_Her presence soothed away his desperation, and he released a breath that was not made of air. It was true. They had all the time in the galaxy. True; nothing so far worked, but try and try again, and eventually, he will find a way to succeed._

_If he could bring himself to._

_"What if…" He trailed off for a moment, "What if I'm going about this all wrong? I want Obi-Wan as my master, but maybe…maybe it would be better for him if he wasn't. Maybe he'd be better off at Agri-Corps. He'd be safe there, untouched by war and darkness. And then I can construct some way to save him when the Purge happens."_

_"Then who will train you?"_

_"I don't know. Qui-Gon."_

_"We will cross that road when we arrive. For now, let us try and ensure that Obi-Wan stays with you. Otherwise, if you two meet as Force spirits, he would not know who you are, nor understand what you have done for him."_

_Anakin nodded, feeling relieved that he would not have to give Obi-Wan up as a master. They will try, they will try and find a way to work around this. They could do this._

_"Alright."  
_

_"Let us think about this. We know what has to happen. Obi-Wan has to be sent to Bandomeer, but he must not arrive, or else he would be stuck in Agri-Corps and will not be trained as a Jedi. His ship has to be boarded by pirates, and he has to face a surge of desperation—confront Death in the face, before he reaches his thirteenth birthday, or else we would have changed nothing—and the only way to do that is if Qui-Gon Jinn is not his master. But if Qui-Gon is not on the same ship, Obi-Wan will die. We know we cannot send Obi-Wan to Bandomeer with another master, because if we do, Obi-Wan will die before you meet him."_

_Anakin nodded. "Right."_

_"So we need to send Obi-Wan to Bandomeer before his thirteenth birthday, and Qui-Gon has to be on the same ship…"_

_"But as soon as Qui-Gon meets Obi-Wan he would know him."_

_"What if Qui-Gon has reason to reject him?"_

_"Like what? What could Obi-Wan possibly do? Get in trouble? Qui-Gon wouldn't care. He knows potential when he sees it, and he's a wise master. Obi-Wan wouldn't be able to commit anything truly atrocious, and anything short of that would not deter Qui-Gon from taking him as a padawan."_

_"What if Qui-Gon is emotionally compromised?"_

_Anakin paused._

_"What?"_

_"If he doesn't want Obi-Wan. If he doesn't want any padawan, and refuses to take Obi-Wan."_

_"Then someone else will take Obi-Wan."_

_"What if we prevent that from happening?"  
_

_"That would hurt Obi-Wan." Anakin shook his head. "I don't want to hurt Obi-Wan. The point was to save him."_

_"You have to let certain things go, Anakin."_

_The blonde youth sighed, running his fingers through his hair._

_"You're right," He said softly._

_ooo_

_"Xanatos DuCrion. Palpatine's first apprentice."_

_"He will turn anyway. It would not alter fate overly much."_

_"As Qui-Gon's padawan? Qui-Gon would never buy into it. He would never accept to train someone like Xanatos. He would reject him outright, and Xanatos will be sent to the service corps."_

_"Not if Qui-Gon has a soft spot for him."_

_"And how do you suggest we accomplish that?"_

_"Time fuels love, Ani. You should know."_

_"So get them to meet early? Before the matches?"_

_"Have Qui-Gon sent to Telos. He will bond with the child. Xanatos is strong in the Force."_

_"But Xanatos' betrayal will hurt Obi-Wan."_

_"Hurt Obi-Wan to save him, Ani. Would you rather he die as a grieving spirit, or a shattered one?"_

_Even without a body, Anakin shuddered, his dread and fear coiling in what made up the Force. He was remembering, years ago and years after, Obi-Wan, blood streaming from his eyes and nose and pooling in his mouth, writhing, thrashing in his restraints. Various implements circled him, stabbed through him, and he writhed in a pain he could no longer sense. Even when Anakin turned the machines off and undid his restraints with trembling fingers, Obi-Wan still shuddered with spasms. He did not recognize his old padawan, did not hear what was said, never knew that Padmé had died, but the children had been saved. They rushed him to the medics who fought to save him for five long hours, but Obi-Wan did not make it._

_The recalled grief darkened the Force around the spirits, as Anakin mourned, as he did so many times. Without Obi-Wan, without his mother, without Padmé, he was alone, and grief and bitterness turned him against the light. He murdered Palpatine, but it was not long before he took his place, and it was Luke and Leia who brought him back from the darkness. He entered the Force expecting to be able to find Obi-Wan, but Obi-Wan's soul had vanished, shredded to pieces from Palpatine's years of nonstop torture._

_Death was inevitable, but this atrocity was something even the Force could not stand, and so Anakin was allowed to save Obi-Wan, if only he knew how._

_"I will kill him myself if it's the only way to preserve his spirit," He replied, the words bitter yet necessary.  
_

_"You know it was Qui-Gon's love that is preventing you from ultimately saving Obi-Wan. He deserves more, perhaps, but if it is that love that will prove to be his doom, our only option is to dilute it."_

_Anakin nodded slowly. "I want to talk to the others first." He paused. "But I will do it if they agree. I will orchestrate the meeting between Qui-Gon and Xanatos and I will bond the two together."_

_ooo_

_Qui-Gon was sitting in the bunk of the ship with the toddler in his arms, his body exuding a protective presence that reminded Anakin of when he first met Obi-Wan. The man had been a new knight, on his first mission separate from Qui-Gon. When he walked into Watto's shop, Anakin had been sitting on the counter, and the boy had been utterly mesmerized by the wise eyes that looked steadily at him. Something in him reached out to the young man, and perhaps it was the Force that told Anakin that this man will deliver him from slavery._

_He had been a confident Jedi, but cunning, with a sharp eye for detail and all that was subtle. He talked circles around Watto and managed to put both Anakin and his mother into the bet by targeting Watto's pride. 'An entire ship versus one slave? You really seem confident that you will lose, or else you would match my stakes.' He exchanged the local currency, which he had traded for Republic credits with a local smuggler, with Watto for the parts, and sent Captain Panaka back to start preparing the ship, while he remained behind with Anakin and Shmi, waiting for the race._

_Anakin knew nothing of the Force, and did not even know that Obi-Wan was a Jedi. He had wanted to win podraces before, but never as keenly as he did now. Before, it was the thrill of the wind zipping past, of guiding the craft along the narrow canyons and threading holes, over bridges or under them at speeds only instinct could keep up with. This time, there was more at stake. His freedom, and that of his mother's, lay in the race, and this man inspired Anakin's faith._

_He won the race and walked out of town with his mother, for the first time free. They had no idea where they would go, but Anakin wanted to go with Obi-Wan, and in that childish inconsideration, requested it from the man. Obi-Wan promised to take care of him and his mother, and they left Tatooine. Anakin never went back._

_In truth, he owed Qui-Gon for his life as much as he owed Obi-Wan, and the spirit felt a pang of regret upon seeing the man hold his heart's bane. Obi-Wan did not want to train Anakin. He felt the Jedi lifestyle would be too difficult to adapt to for a former slave who had always needed to obey others. Training as a Jedi would take Anakin away from his mother, and Obi-Wan did not want Anakin to have to choose. He had been working on giving Shmi a good situation, a paying job where she could provide for herself and her son, when Qui-Gon had stepped in. The Jedi Master had been adamant that Anakin was the Chosen One, and had quarreled with his former padawan for days while the Queen of Naboo met with the Senate. Qui-Gon demanded Obi-Wan take Anakin to meet with the Council, which Obi-Wan reluctantly agreed to do, and that was when Anakin learned that Obi-Wan was a Jedi Knight._

_The Council agreed with Obi-Wan, which led Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan to argue for another day, as Padmé, as Queen Amidala, addressed the Senate to seek Republic aid. Anakin and the other Jedi listened as tempers rose, with Qui-Gon insisting that Anakin was the Chosen One and must be trained, and Obi-Wan adamantly proclaiming that Anakin deserved a normal, happy life of love and family, which led to Qui-Gon's accusation that to Obi-Wan, the Jedi Master had always been merely his teacher, when Qui-Gon had always thought of Obi-Wan as a son._

_But even with hurt feelings, when Obi-Wan was dispatched with Garen Muln to protect the Queen, Qui-Gon switched posts with Garen to go on the same mission. Before they left, in his bluntness of youth, Anakin asked Qui-Gon why he was so insistent that Obi-Wan train him, and why Qui-Gon did not consider training Anakin himself. Qui-Gon claimed he was too old to train another padawan._

_He died on Naboo._

_Perhaps he always knew. Obi-Wan suspected that despite Qui-Gon's preference for the Living Force, he had a premonition that he would not see Obi-Wan again after the mission, so he endured Obi-Wan's fuming during the trip to Naboo if only to spend more time with his former padawan. Obi-Wan, who was strong in the Unifying Force, never realized any of this, and gave his former master the silent treatment whenever possible. He never forgave himself for this.  
_

_Afterwards, Obi-Wan took Anakin as his padawan, but explained, explicitly, that Anakin must discuss this with his mother, and decide if a Jedi's life was truly right for him. He told the boy that there might come a time when Anakin must choose between Shmi and the galaxy, and that as a Jedi, he would be expected to choose the galaxy. The price of power, Obi-Wan told him, is responsibility. As a Jedi, Shmi would not be Anakin's mother. She will merely be the same as everyone else in the galaxy, and could only be extended the same protection. 'Truly great beings are not those who merely do great things, Anakin, but ones who sacrifice what is dear to them in order to do so.'_

_Anakin did discuss this with his mother, who explained to him that she was part of the past, and that it was every mother's wish that their children would move on and progress in the world. 'I will die before you, Anakin,' She had said, 'I am part of the last generation, and you are the next. If anything happens to me, I will rest with the knowledge that you are doing well in the world, that my son is a great man doing great things.'_

_If not for Qui-Gon, Anakin would never have trained under Obi-Wan's tutelage. It felt like a betrayal, of sorts, hurting Qui-Gon this way, guiding him to an apprentice who would betray his love and devotion, but part of Anakin felt that if Qui-Gon knew what would happen to the padawan he was most proud of, the Jedi Master would not blame Anakin. Not as much, anyway._

_"He has bonded with the child?"_

_Anakin nodded. "That he has."_

_"Then we better hurry to see if Obi-Wan faces death and escapes."_

_"Right."_

_ooo_

_Obi-Wan was taken by another master._

_"We got Qui-Gon out of the picture, at least."_

_Anakin ran his phantom fingers through his hair._

_"I just killed Obi-Wan. Again. And I accidentally gave myself a different master."_

_"Well is his soul shattered this time, or did he die before then?"_

_"He died before he even became a Jedi Knight."_

_"Hm."_

_"I don't even care if he's not actually my master anymore. I just want him to die a Jedi Master and…_not _in pieces."_

_"If he survives, he is captured and tortured by the Sith. If he dies, he's not a knight."_

_"What kind of stupid…shouldn't things be easier on this side of the Force?"_

_"You know better, Anakin."_

_Anakin sighed._

_"We need Qui-Gon as his master. We need to get the other masters out of the way."_

_"Perhaps we need some interference from those in the timeline."_

_"Like who?" Anakin scowled. "_Yoda?_ Should we have _him _interfere?"_

_"He is strong enough in the Force to hear you, Ani. Perhaps you should talk to him."_

_"I don't like Yoda."_

_"But you love Obi-Wan. Surely that is more important than your dislike of the Grand Master."_

_This was true._

_"Tell him that Obi-Wan belongs with Qui-Gon. After Xanatos, Qui-Gon needs to heal. Obi-Wan will do that for him."_

_Anakin sighed again, but nodded._

_"Very well."  
_

_ooo  
_

_Obi-Wan was lost and confused._

_Anakin watched as the twelve-year-old boy sat huddled on his cot, trying to release his anguished feelings in the Force while holding back tears. Part of him wished he could apologize to him right now, but too much of him was elated._

_Obi-Wan was being sent to Bandomeer._

_Yoda was sending Qui-Gon to the same place on the same ship._

_And Qui-Gon was too emotionally compromised to properly protect Obi-Wan._

_Though the boy could not see him, Anakin knelt in front of the bed and smiled at the young face contorted with misery._

_"It will be alright, you'll see," He promised Obi-Wan, even though his words went unheard. "You will face Death in the face. It will kick your Force potential into gear, and you will never get sick, will never be overwhelmed by the Sith, will never be tortured until you disappear. I hope you still end up becoming my master…even if I will turn, either way. It was my destiny to turn, to bring balance to the Force, but this time, it will not cost you your soul. Just be yourself, Master, and you'll see; all will be well."_

_He pressed a phantom kiss on the child's brow, just as Obi-Wan had done to him so many times in life. The boy felt it, but did not understand, nor interpret it as a gesture of comfort. A tear finally leaked out of the child's eyes, and though Anakin yearned to, he could not brush it away, and therefore did not try._

_"You can be such an idiot sometimes, Master," He smiled, "How can you think you'd never be a Jedi?"_

_He stood and looked at the boy for a while, before disappearing to watch events unfold.  
_


	3. Chapter Three

Filial Piety

Chapter Three

Anakin did not return for three days, during which time the sandstorm never ceased. While Tatooine had its share of such storms, rarely were they this long. It was impossible to go out, and Obi-Wan found himself worrying that the Lars family might not have prepared for the storm as Obi-Wan had. He could not contact them in the storm, however, and could only trust in the Force to protect them. Surely, they have encountered situations like this before, in their long years as natives on the planet.

On the fourth day, Anakin returned. Obi-Wan was at the kitchen table, trying to will himself to cook, or at least piece together a quick meal. He started in surprise at the sight of the man. After three days, he thought Anakin was not coming back.

"Have you been taking proper care of yourself, Master?" Anakin frowned when he saw him.

"Anakin." It was all Obi-Wan could manage.

"I'd cook for you, but even when I was alive, I wasn't much of one." Anakin gestured at the table. "Make a sandwich already."

Obi-Wan stared at him for a moment, before turning to the table.

"Aren't you going to ask me where I went?"

Obi-Wan did not answer.

"Fine, I'll tell you myself. I was talking to the other Jedi. They're not happy that I keep seeing you. I told them to bugger off. That didn't go well with them, which was what took me so long."

That sounded like Anakin, even if the situation was completely unrealistic. "The other Jedi are dead."

"Yes." Anakin nodded. "If you remember the last time I spoke with you, I'm a Force ghost. I'm dead too. In fact, where I came from, you were dead too, and so was Yoda. You wanted to hang around for Luke, and so did I, really, but it was supposed to be time already. You weren't too thrilled about that."

Obi-Wan made a sandwich. He bit into it to give himself an excuse not to talk.

"Come to think of it, I don't think anyone's all that happy except Siri Tachi." Anakin folded his arms. "And she was happy because her padawan was alive. Ex-padawan. It figures that if anyone could survive the purges, it would be goody-two-shoes Ferus Olin."

The Jedi Master paused. Anakin seemed to be right about the sandstorm. "Ferus Olin is alive?"

Anakin nodded. "He's with a handful of Jedi. They're lying low on asteroid and moon colonies to hide from the imperials."

Obi-Wan set the sandwich down. He should contact Yoda, see if this is true. Perhaps…perhaps he could secure several Jedi on Tatooine, to better protect Luke. Then…then Obi-Wan would not have to stay. He could go—

"Wait wait wait," Anakin cut through his thoughts as he seemed prone to do; even as a hallucination, he did not seem content to allow his master to think. "Don't get ahead of yourself, Master. You…better stay where you are, and Yoda can stay where he is, and let the other Jedi take care of themselves. Besides, if they come to Tatooine, they'd attract…my attention. That would…not be good."

He paused.

"You can always take Luke, you know. Why won't you visit my son?"

"I don't want to visit your son."

Anakin blinked, as if he did not expect that, and Obi-Wan could hardly believe he had just uttered that out loud.

"Why not? He's just a kid! A baby! You don't blame _him _for all the things that have happened, do you?"

"Of course not," Obi-Wan picked up the sandwich while ordering himself to stop talking to thin air, but it seemed his tongue had a mind of its own. "I don't even blame you. I blame Palpatine for all this, but I don't want to see your son. It hurts badly enough right now, when I'm alone in this hovel. I can't…I can't stand it if…" He sighed heavily and bit into his sandwich again.

"He's better than me." Anakin shifted back and forth. "Not as tall—dang it but he got Padmé's height; I think it's the genes from folks in Naboo or something, but they're all short, even Sidious was—but you can't have everything, and he's more anchored to the light than I was, than I am. And kids are all annoying, but Luke didn't whine as much as I do. He definitely didn't whine as much as his sister. I swear, royalty…but he's not as annoying as some people. Certainly better than many of the younglings. Leia…has my temper and her mother's wit. I still wonder what on earth I created in her. And marrying Han…by the Force, if I had been alive…but whatever. Anyway, Luke's a sweet kid, and as I said, he'd help you as much as you helped him."

"I am not going to see Luke. He belongs with his family, and Owen and Beru are good people who will take care of him like their own child, and I promised to let Luke live that normal childhood you were deprived of, that I was never able to give to you—"

"Owen and Beru were my _step—_and _you _would take care of him like your own—you think living on this dustball planet constitutes as _normal?_"

He was not going to dignify that with an answer. Honestly, some of the statements were putting him on edge. Obi-Wan knew the mind was a mysterious thing, but he doubted that what was happening—all of Anakin's unexpected reactions, could be conjured up from his own head. Was something else at work here? He reached into the Force, but though it answered him with that same encouraging glow that he always found whenever he sought for its touch, it provided no clarifications at all.

"This would be a lot easier if I were allowed to…" Anakin grumbled under his breath, and he looked up at Obi-Wan with a miffed expression. "Turns out, even when dead, you _still _don't escape the rules. Figures. Ah!" He suddenly blinked. "Son of a—I'll be right back!"

In the quiet emptiness that followed, Obi-Wan noted that Anakin seemed very keen on promising Obi-Wan of his return. He wondered if this meant anything either for the directions of the Force, or for his own state of mind. With another sigh, he finished his sandwich and cleared the plate of any crumbs.

ooo

Another three days passed. The sandstorm went on, and Obi-Wan noted that had Anakin's phantom not warned him to buy stocks, he might very well have been in grave trouble by this time. He was hacking into a holo terminal to prepare to receive messages from the holonet, in order to keep up to date with Republic activities. He needed a receiver outside the hut, and with the sandstorm waging, he could not go out, but he might as well set things up indoors.

Anakin would have found a way to receive signals even in a sandstorm. He was a genius in engineering, and surpassed everything Obi-Wan had thought himself good at. His hands slowed as his heart grew heavy with the memory of happier times.

"What are you doing with that wire?" Anakin asked, bending over so his glowing blue form almost touched Obi-Wan's robe. "That connects to…oh. Say, Master, that's quite clever. Since when were you good at this?"

"I was always good at this," Obi-Wan shuddered, "You were just better." He lowered his hands so they rested on his lap where he knelt in front of the terminal.

Anakin settled himself down next to him, still careful not to touch him. "You stopped. What's wrong?"

"You're distracting me."

"You usually have better focus than this."

"I haven't been sleeping well lately."

"Well," Anakin glanced at the table, "At least you're eating. Bet you're glad I told you to stock up, eh? Told you, you'd be trapped here for a while. Son of a bantha, but I hate this planet."

"Language, Anakin," Obi-Wan said tiredly, though part of him wondered why he bothered.

"Oh please," Anakin said lightly, "I haven't allowed myself to curse in decades. Kind of hard to waste your breath when you have a respirator. Not to mention, the Emperor was such a louse. Wanted to keep up appearances—_cursing is not befitting of a Sith Lord_. We had to look and behave all regal, and he wondered why I choked everyone—ah, but it feels nice to swear." He uttered several colorful Huttese phrases for a good measure. "Besides, I want you to take my son."

"We've…" He wanted to say that they have been over this already, but he was incredibly confused as to why his hallucination would be so insistent on this matter. Was some part of his subconscious telling him that this was what Anakin would have wanted?

Or was this Anakin really a Force…ghost?

"Look," Anakin leaned forward, eyes sharp and demanding, "I didn't come all this way to watch you destroy yourself, Obi-Wan. This moping business doesn't suit you. You're the greatest Jedi to ever live. Act like it."

Must be his ego talking. Obi-Wan thought he had dealt with that personality flaw.

Anakin reached out, but drew his hand back with another expletive. "This sucks," He complained, "You were all 'I will be more powerful than you can ever imagine' and making me think that this side really had some stuff to offer, but how am I supposed to do anything when I can't touch anything?"

Obi-Wan just stared at him. Once again, he was lost.

"I want you to raise my son."

Obi-Wan sat back. "You hate me," He gritted his teeth, "You said so yourself."

"That was Vader, and everyone says things they don't mean from time to time."

Obi-Wan raised a finger, not even bothering to release his grief into the Force, "Don't. Just stop."

"I'm not going to stop. This is ridiculous. You have nothing to feel guilty for. I understand I hurt you a lot, but none of it was your fault, and I want you to take care of my son. This isn't for me," Anakin went on, "Nor is this for Luke. Luke will be fine no matter what, provided that you're careful and everyone is careful—this is for _you_, because I want to help _you_, and by the Force, Luke is the only gift I can give to you. Well, Leia too, but Padmé already called dibs on her and gave her to Breha and Bail, and I told Padmé that at least one of the twins, if not both, are going to keep you company, give you joy, and where are you going? Hey!"

He was going crazy, Obi-Wan decided, as he struggled to his feet. There was that pressure in his throat again, and he felt liquid warmth spill over his eyes before he could stop it. He was going crazy, his mind was playing tricks, and he could not stand it. He could not stand it, and he wished there was someone to help him but there was no one and he was all alone on this dustball planet that had housed Anakin's childhood but Anakin was not here and—

"Just leave me alone!" Obi-Wan shouted, over the dull scratches of sand that blew against the hovel. "Leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone!"

Fire all around him, sulfur and smoke, the glowing lava beneath them and floating buoys, fighting with blades that hurt every time they clashed, the motion jarring his entire body as sharply as a knife to the heart. Even as contorted with hate as it was, with yellow eyes and a fearsome grimace, Obi-Wan only saw the face of that boy that captured his heart, despite the Jedi Code, despite his former misgivings, and it felt more like a mere nightmare back then than it did now. He always thought nightmares were meant to frighten. He never thought nightmares could drain him of all hope. He wished he had never been a Jedi, had never trained Anakin, that he had died on Naboo that fateful day, that he had done everything differently, saw all the warning signs, addressed all of Anakin's fears, been a better guardian, teacher, master, parent—the sob wailed from his throat and dwindled into a whimper and he gritted his teeth in a continued effort to stop his weeping before he broke down completely.

It hurts. Force, it hurts so much. It hurts _so much—_

"Master," Anakin looked more solemn now, as he moved to stand beside Obi-Wan, but the Jedi Master turned away and leaned against the wall of the hut, feeling it vibrate from being struck by pounds of sand. The solid feeling of stone under his skin helped to center him, and his shoulders stopped shaking before he even realized they were quivering in the first place.

Long silence ensued, though Anakin remained close, his form glowiing that clear blue, like a lightsaber.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," Anakin went on, "But I would have turned, either way. I was the Chosen One. Chosen One does not mean I would get to live in a rose garden. Chosen One meant responsibility, and it was my responsibility to turn to the Dark Side at the right time. There was nothing you could have done, at all. I'm sorry."

Obi-Wan looked at him with bleary eyes. There was no way a hallucination would say that. Obi-Wan had never even thought of things that way, that the galaxy would create a Chosen One specifically to fall to the Dark Side…and nothing in his subconscious would either.

Was he really a Force ghost? But Vader was alive and still at large…did Anakin's turning strip him of his soul? An alien feeling rose in his chest. Maybe…maybe that creature he fought on Mustafar, who had choked Padmé and shouted that he hated Obi-Wan…maybe that had not been Anakin after all.

But Anakin had mentioned hating Obi-Wan's guts. He had felt that hate.

None of this made any sense.

"Why won't you raise Luke?" Anakin pressed. "You'd make a great parent, and Luke…Luke will adore you. He will absolutely adore you and take great care of you; much better than I did, though he'll still be an annoying brat because all kids are annoying. And he is stronger than me. Not in the Force, but his will would give Yoda a run for his money. Did, in fact," He sighed. "I want you to have Luke. He's the only gift I can give you."

"I don't want your gifts," Obi-Wan said numbly.

Anakin ducked his head. "I deserved that. But this will be good for you. I don't want you to spend the next two decades all alone as crazy old Ben, only to die straight afterwards. I can't change what happened with the Purge, but I can give you this. Take Luke."

Obi-Wan honestly did not want Luke. The boy reminded him too much of Anakin, and he was too heartsick to think more openly. "I already gave him to the Lars. They've already started to bond with him…besides, he'd have a female figure in his life, which I can't provide."

"He'd make do without one, and as I said, this is good for _you_. You need company here. There will be other dust storms, and you can't rely on constantly meditating."

"I am a Jedi. I do not need company. I have the Force."

"That's banthaspit and you know it. You have the Force, and all your memories of Order 66, our battle on Mustafar and me constantly searching the galaxy for you as Vader. That won't heal you, Master. And by the Force, as long as you think I'm a hallucination, _I _can't heal you either."

Obi-Wan blinked, his mind swirling into clarity for a moment. "I don't think you're a hallucination. I just don't know what you are. I don't understand how you could be here when you are sending imperial troops to scout for any Force sensitives left in the galaxy, or why you would even want to talk to me when you loathe my very name."

"That's not fair, that's—"Anakin abruptly cut himself off. "Well, that _is_ fair. I guess." He looked morose. "But…I don't hate you, Obi-Wan. I wish I didn't have to hurt you, but," He bit his lip, "See, the thing with Force spirits…time isn't unidirectional for us. We have rules…which I won't state now, but following chronology isn't one of them, so we can emerge at any timepoint. There's something I should probably tell you—oh _sithspit_, what now? I'll be right back," And he disappeared.

Obi-Wan blinked at the place he left and wondered if he had fallen asleep without realizing it and dreamed the entire exchange. There was absolutely nothing, in the Force or in the layout of the room, to suggest Anakin had ever been here at all.

ooo

Anakin did not return until nighttime.

Obi-Wan was trying to meditate, but Anakin's voice jarred him out of it like getting dunked in ice cold water.

"Sorry about that," Said the phantom, "Palpatine was meditating and I had to help cloud his vision of the future. It was a headache wrestling with Maul, though. I don't even know why that zabrak even cares about what's happening in the living galaxy. Crazy tattooed menace…" He dropped down in meditative pose across from the Jedi Master and grinned. "So. Take care of my son?"

Not this again.

"I don't need anything from you…Anakin," Obi-Wan swallowed, wondering if it was wise to believe, even slightly, that this vision in front of him was really a Force spirit from the future, but he was so tired and sick, he had no strength to fight against what he saw. "I…I just want you. Back. I just want my brother back. I want my former padawan back. If you want to haunt someone, why don't you haunt your current self?"

Anakin's grin faded, and he looked at Obi-Wan with inscrutable eyes.

The Jedi Master sighed, glancing down as he moved to stand, averting his gaze from Anakin's, because what was the point of anything?

The phantom was silent, remaining where he was in meditative pose, as Obi-Wan paced. When it became apparent the young man was not leaving, the Jedi Master set to work making dinner. He made another sandwich from cold rations, and though his appetite was poor, he started eating so he was busy doing something other than focusing on Anakin's hurtful presence.

And then Anakin spoke again.

"Qui-Gon never went to Telos, never found Xanatos. He trained someone else…I forget who, but it does not matter. He loved you as soon as you two first met. You were nine years old, and you bonded with him, Obi-Wan. He was impressed. He took you when you were ten years old and became your master."

What? What kind of lunacy is this?

"That's how it originally happened, Master. You two had a closer relationship than you did in this timeline."

Obi-Wan stopped chewing and looked at Anakin. Timelines? Was this Anakin from an alternate future? Could it be? Was this even possible? He might have to speak to Yoda about this…

"You were a knight, when I first met you. I guess you reached knighthood a lot sooner because your relationship with Qui-Gon was better. They sent you by yourself for the fiasco with Naboo. Your first solo mission after you were knighted. You were the one who found me, and you freed both me and my mother. You didn't want me as a Jedi; not even when you discovered I was strong in the Force. You didn't think I would adapt well to the Temple lifestyle, having to let go of my mother and all. Qui-Gon pressured you into training me, or at least taking me before the Council, and you did, and it's sort of similar in that Qui-Gon was the only person who thought I should be trained—hey where are you going?"

Obi-Wan was trying to get away from the phantom. Too bad the hut was so small. There was nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide.

"Why can't I be haunted by Qui-Gon?" He muttered. Part of him still could not believe Anakin was real, ghost or not. Besides, Vader was still out there, so while the Anakin Skywalker he knew and loved had perished, the boy was not _dead_, and none of this made any sense and it was too painful to talk to the child—

"I'm hurt and aghast, Master!" And though the words were half joking, Anakin's face looked more vulnerable and open than Obi-Wan had ever seen him. "Though I guess I deserved that…but if it makes you feel better, Qui-Gon will be haunting you. Often. He really misses you, and he's really upset with me…for a number of things."

"I don't see where this is going."

"I'm a bad storyteller, I guess," Anakin actually knelt on the floor in front of Obi-Wan, looking up at him with his hands folded on his knees. Obi-Wan stared down, throat raw as he flashed back to a time when their positions had been reversed, when Anakin had been sitting on the couch and Obi-Wan had knelt in front and they simply talked, about everything and nothing, with no idea that the galaxy would come to this—

"Qui-Gon and you had a huge row about it. He wanted you to train me, you thought you were too young and I was too old, too attached to my mother. You said you will train me techniques in the Force, but not to be a full Jedi and not how to use a lightsaber, and Qui-Gon said that wasn't enough. The Jedi Council sent you and Garen to Naboo to protect Padmé, but Qui-Gon suddenly switched with Garen. The masters said it was because he had a bad premonition, which makes ever so much sense since he was oh so well versed in the Unifying Force…" Anakin made a face, "But in a way they were right. Qui-Gon felt that if he let you go with Garen, the last words you two said to each other would have been hurtful things. So he wanted to extend the period…and did, sort of. You two argued all the way there, and when you weren't arguing you two were fuming at each other. "

Obi-Wan exhaled. This, at least, did not seem to deviate from the rather hard feelings he and Qui-Gon possessed for each other on their last mission. The circumstances were completely different, however. Qui-Gon cared much less for Obi-Wan than Anakin was depicting.

"Well, the same things sort of happened after that…Qui-Gon didn't want you to face the Sith Lord, even an apprentice, so he raced ahead to fight him himself and ended up leaving you to do it alone anyway. You ended up taking me as a padawan after he died, and you tried your best and everyone could see that. Honestly, if there's one thing I could change about _this_ lifetime, I wish I could have been less of a bantha's…but I digress—hey, where are you going? Why do you keep—"

"I'm brewing some tea," Obi-Wan muttered as he slipped past the phantom to boil some water. Tea was a precious few dry leaves that hardly left any flavor in the water at all when brewed, but like the deserts of the planet, everything was scarce, and Obi-Wan was not in the mood for much flavor anyway. He still had no idea where Anakin's narration was leading.

"Oh," Anakin paused, as he watched Obi-Wan work. After a moment, he said, "Well, obviously it did not happen this time around. Qui-Gon _did _find Xanatos on Telos, trained him, got turned against, and refused to train you…you do realize it was because of _him_ and not you, right?"

"I really do not want to talk about this."

"You just don't want to talk to me," Anakin huffed, "But I'm the only one who can talk to you. At least until Yoda trains you to be able to perceive the rest of us."

"What rest of us?"

"Qui-Gon. Mace Windu. My mom. Padmé. Siri too. And Bant and Garen. Luke's not allowed to, because I've booked the time range before he becomes a Jedi. You _are _going to take care of him, right Master?"

A watched pot never boils, though it was starting to steam a little. Obi-Wan found himself glaring at the phantom. "So you are a Force spirit."

"Right." Anakin beamed. "I'm not a hallucination."

"From the future."

"That's right."

"Why are you here?"

"To talk to you."

"What for?" Obi-Wan stared. "You can go back in the past, change things."

"I already did." Anakin's face suddenly looked sullen. "Many times. I've finally constructed a timeline I'm somewhat happy with. It's not perfect, but nothing can be perfect, not even me." He grinned cheekily. "But, lo and behold, I at least accomplished all of my goals."

"Which were?"

"You're not sick anymore, _and _you're still my master. I'm happy."

Obi-Wan had no idea what he was talking about. The water bubbled, and he turned the heat off.

"I don't understand."

Anakin looked up at him with sparkling eyes, and Obi-Wan was reminded of a much younger Anakin, peering up at him as he cooked, with the grave expression of a terrified youngster whose life was changing, but whose fate remained unknown.

"It's a long story," The spirit said. "It starts with the first Anakin Skywalker."


	4. Chapter Four

Filial Piety

Chapter Three

_"You must control your temper," Thirty-two-year-old Obi-Wan scolded as he navigated the controls. Coruscant's skyline swept with lines of traffic. One particular flyer cut through the lanes like a maniac, and Anakin knew that the pilot would soon be stopped by the patrols in the front unless he slowed down._

_"He deserved it," The sixteen-year-old padawan sulked. "He was a filthy scumbag."_

_"Be that as it may," Obi-Wan pulled the brakes to turn, "You should control your temper, not let your temper control you. Do you have any idea how you appeared to everyone back there? Embarrassing the Senator, __embarrassing yourself, __embarrassing _me_, and embarrassing the Jedi Order."_

_"Right." Anakin sniffed in disdain. "I'm an embarrassment. That's nothing new."_

_"Don't try that," Obi-Wan reproached, as he made another turn. The tall skyscrapers gleamed in the afternoon light, and Obi-Wan braked to allow another ship to enter the traffic. "And pretending to accept this as the state of affairs is not going to excuse you. You may be a padawan learner, but you are still very much a Jedi, and you must uphold the expectations the Order has of its members."_

_"That means not feeling," Anakin scoffed, "Which is just stupid. Emotions are supposed to guide. If everyone else can follow their emotions, why can't I?"_

_"Because you're _not _like everyone else. 'Everyone else' is not Force sensitive."_

_"Well then the Force should have just stripped away my emotions then!" Anakin snapped, "Because it sure as Sith doesn't make sense!"_

_"Language, Anakin!"_

_"You're always criticizing me!" Anakin exploded. "You never notice when I do something right. I am better than all the other padawans my age, but everyone just keeps pressing me down and holding me back! You're always paying attention to when I'm doing something wrong, and everyone thinks I'm going to fail or turn anyway. That green troll keeps thinking my 'future is clouded in darkness' and all you do is point out all my flaws!"_

_"If you stop following up your good deeds with bad ones, I'd have a chance to compliment you. People do not think you will fail or turn, and are only slightly more wary of you than anyone else in the Order because you do not _control your temper._ That green troll is Master Yoda and you should know that when he said your future is "clouded" he did not always, in fact ever, imply that it was your fault. In fact, he is always criticizing _me_, when he was not merely remarking on the trials that we foresee you will endure, and I am only trying to make you a better Jedi than you were yesterday, which normally, people would appreciate."_

_"Right," Anakin sneered, "You want me to be a great Jedi, the Chosen One, just as Qui-Gon said."_

_"I could care less if you were the Chosen One or not. And Qui-Gon has nothing to do with how I am teaching you."_

_"Oh really? So you would have trained me even if Qui-Gon didn't die? What was it, his dying wish? Something you couldn't refuse?"_

_The apartment complex loomed closer, and Obi-Wan pulled out of the traffic to the side. He did not answer, and his mind was heavily shielded, which was enough for Anakin. When he docked on the platform, the teen unstrapped himself with brisk movements and stepped out, slamming the door shut. He did not turn to see if Obi-Wan remained or flew away, though he did not hear the engines thrum._

_Coruscant's skyscape was filled with traffic, and the sun was starting to set. Anakin took out his keycard to swipe into the doors. As he turned in the lobby, he saw Obi-Wan's ship still docked on the platform, but did not think much of it. The elevator was already on the main floor, and he walked in, stated his destination, and leaned against the walls as the lift closed, gritting his teeth angrily._

_It was unfair. The man deserved it. He was a greasy politician, who allowed the deaths of thousands of people all to obtain a few million credits. Then he had the gall to try to cast off all blame. Anakin should be allowed to punch him. In fact, he was disappointed that Obi-Wan even thought of speaking civilly to the man. But Obi-Wan was always a perfect Jedi, and nothing Anakin ever did was good enough, and—_

_"Ani!" Shmi was already waiting in the hall when the lift opened. "I saw Obi-Wan's ship outside and saw you enter the building."_

_Anakin stepped out. "Hi Mom."_

_"How was the mission?"_

_ooo_

_Eighteen-year-old Anakin was stabbing into his plate._

_"What did that bantha steak ever do to you?"_

_"I hate Temple cafeteria food. Mom would make it so much better." Giving up, Anakin leaned back. "If it weren't for my master, I'd be with her right now. She's all alone in her apartment, by herself."_

_"I'm sure she can take care of herself."_

_"That's not the point." Anakin scowled, tugging a little on his padawan braid, "She shouldn't have to. I'm supposed to be _there_, for her, and it's bad enough that I have to be away on missions and leave her all alone. But my master doesn't understand."_

_The other padawans shrugged. They did not quite empathize, having no parents to keep in contact with. Most of them did not even know their parents, or even what planets they came from. Their entire lives revolved around the Jedi Order, and that was enough for them._

_"Well, look on the bright side. At least you're hanging out with us."_

_Anakin smiled a little. "I guess."_

_"Besides, Master Kenobi's probably tightening the reins because the Council was chewing him out earlier today for letting you visit your mom so much."_

_"What? No way," Anakin rolled his eyes, "They were reprimanding him?"_

_"I saw them arguing earlier, in the lobby. They were being quiet, so I didn't hear anything clearly, but I heard them mention 'Shmi Skywalker' and 'unacceptable absences', things like that."_

_"No way…He doesn't let me visit her that much!"_

_"He's allowed you to visit her every time you return from a mission for the past…eight or nine years, give or take. I overheard Master Windu reproaching him, saying that he'd be a permanent member of the Council if he didn't keep breaking rules for you."_

_"What?" Anakin's voice was high and shrill. He had never heard of this. "That makes _no _sense. My master is a sucker for rules. He's always reprimanding me for breaking them, nag nag nag, and giving me extra meditations and chores. Besides, what rules were he breaking, anyway?"_

_"I don't know."_

_"Rumor has it that he'd sometimes secretly do your errands for you, even though the Council assigned _you _to do them."_

_"My master says Master Kenobi's always getting reproached by the Council. They even put him on probation a lot. He always tries to get Master Tachi to cover for him when he goes on solo missions he wasn't assigned on."_

_"Oh seriously?" Another padawan exclaimed. "Force! That would certainly irk them a lot. No wonder Yoda's always whacking his shins."_

_"What solo missions?" Anakin stared._

_"Don't know. I think they were yours, but can't be sure."_

_"Sith! I wish _my _master were like that…I certainly could use more downtime. The Council's been sending me on so many solo missions; granted they weren't too long, but I sure would like to be here for the annual street fair at least one more time before I get knighted…"_

_"My master is always saying I'm lazy, which is just unfair. She's been requesting more solo missions for me. I think she's trying to get me away from her…"  
_

_"Be nice to him, Ani," A girl grinned, "Master Kenobi's probably just on probation again, as per usual. As soon as he's off, you'd be visiting your mom again."_

_Anakin had no idea what to say to this.  
_

_ooo  
_

_"Senator Amidala was attacked last night," Thirty-six-year-old Obi-Wan told Garen as the twenty-year-old Anakin walked behind. "It was some shapeshifter, but someone shot her before we could find any information."_

_"And the senator?"_

_"Unharmed. She's at the Senate now, speaking."_

_"That's good. Is the Council dispatching Jedi to guard her?"_

_"Possibly. Haven't heard. Where are you two going?"_

_"I'm heading back to my quarters. Anakin's going to see his mother."_

_"Ah. Shmi? That old girl. She's an awesome cook. Better not let Reeft know, or he'll try to eat everything she has."_

_Obi-Wan chuckled. "You're not sounding much better yourself, Garen. I'll see you later?"_

_"Sure, Obi."_

_The other Jedi Knight walked away, and Obi-Wan turned to Anakin._

_"Try to stay within the speed limits this time, Anakin," Obi-Wan murmured in a reproving tone, "I know it's been a while since you last saw your mother, but that's no excuse to endanger everyone else in traffic."_

_"I know, Master," Anakin sighed. Nag nag nag, always nagging. Obi-Wan was a model Jedi and _never _flies past the speed limit—_

_"Say hi to your mother for me, will you?" Obi-Wan was smiling, and Anakin's resentment faded as his master clapped him on the shoulder._

_"You performed well, Anakin. I'm proud of you."_

_The young man's heart swelled with warmth, remembering the previous night's sniper chase. True, they did not figure out who sent the sniper to attack Padmé, but at least Padmé was alive and uninjured. Overall, the mission was a success. "Thank you, Master."_

_Obi-Wan branched off to his apartments, and Anakin headed to the hangar. Still buzzing with elation at receiving the compliment, he made sure to stay within the speed limit at all times, already imagining how he would relate the news to his mother. It was morning, the sun still rising in the sky, and the streets were noisy with the sound of honking speeders and zooming planes._

_Into the complex, through the lobby, up the elevators, into the hallway—his mother's door was open, which probably meant she saw him arrive. He pushed in—and drew back in alarm._

_The furniture was overturned. Several frames were off the walls and glassware was shattered on the floor. There was a smear of blood along one of the walls.  
_

_What happened here? Dread formed in his stomach, along with horror. _

_"Mom? Mom are you here? Are you alright? It's Ani. Mom? Mom?"_

_ooo_

_"His mother was kidnapped. Surely there are others for the mission," Obi-Wan argued with Mace, as Anakin struggled not to lose his composure. Obi-Wan's steady hand on his shoulder did much to ground him, but the panic in his chest threatened to explode out of him._

_"We are under constant attack by the Separatists, Obi-Wan, you know this. You told us you made it clear to him that when the time comes, he is expected to put the needs of the galaxy before the needs of himself. This includes his mother."_

_"Senator Amidala could be protected just as well by regular guards. Once she goes back to Naboo, she should be safe from further attacks."_

_"We don't know that, Obi-Wan, and she is a very important member of the government. The order stands. Anakin is to guard Senator Amidala until we deem her health to be secure."_

_What? Anakin could not believe what he was hearing. Was Master Windu seriously expecting Anakin to sit this one out? He clenched his fist, but a quick squeeze from Obi-Wan prevented him from lashing out at the dark-skinned man. Mace gave Anakin an apologetic look._

_"We will get to the bottom of this, Padawan Skywalker, but for now, you have pressing matters to attend to."_

_When the Jedi Master left, Anakin whirled on Obi-Wan._

_"I'm supposed to just _abandon _my mother?"_

_"Master Windu is right." Obi-Wan was firm. "When I took you as my padawan learner, I warned you that such a case might happen. You discussed this with your mother and she agreed to allow you to become a Jedi. This is the price we all pay, Anakin. You will trust the local authorities to take care of this."_

_"She could be hurt! She could be—" No, not dead. His mother could not be dead._

_"There is nothing you can do, Anakin."_

_"You're pathetic!" Anakin exploded, alarming the local officers, who glanced his way in alarm, surprised that a Jedi would behave like this. "You don't care at all!"_

_"On the contrary, Anakin," Obi-Wan said in that infuriatingly calm voice of his, "I understand your predicament very well."_

_"Well if you do, then you would have tried harder to allow me to get to the bottom of this! You don't care! You don't care about her and you don't care about me! All _you _care about is being a model Jedi! It's no better than being a slave!"_

_Obi-Wan shut his eyes to compose himself, and looked like he was about to speak, but Anakin did not give him a chance to. He whirled around, cape fluttering, and stalked out in a rage, leaving his master standing in the ruined apartment with the bewildered investigators._

_ooo_

_"You've been quiet," Padmé noticed. "I remember you were such a talkative kid when we first met. Is something wrong?"_

_Anakin could only sigh. The two looked out over the peaceful lake, the sky dark overhead and the waters glistening in the moonlight. The air was fresh and cool, and waves lapped onto the shore in a soft rhythm. Padme was dressed in a flowing gown, locks of hair trailing down her bare shoulders. She looked like…an angel, really. A celestial, immortal beauty that was out of this world. For all her loveliness, however, Anakin could not pull his mind from what he was not doing, from what he deeply yearned to do.  
_

_"I just…there's a lot on my mind, that's all."_

_"Well, if you need to talk to someone, I'm here."_

_For a long time, Anakin was silent. He was remembering his mother's anguished screams. She was on Nar Shaddaa, he sensed, through the dream. The nightmares had become more and more vivid each night, and he found no composure in looking at the serene visage before him. Naboo was much more beautiful than Tatooine, but his mother was on Nar Shaddaa and there was really nowhere else he would rather be than on that planet, searching for her and freeing her from her kidnappers._

_"My mother's in trouble," He finally said, "She's missing, and…I'm not allowed to search for her."_

_Padmé was silent for a while, and for a moment he wondered if she understood him._

_"Why not?" She finally asked._

_Because he was here, protecting her…but how could he say it without making this her fault? Padmé was not the one who insisted on having a Jedi bodyguard. In fact, she had even protested, knowing that the Order was being stretched thin by the guerrilla attacks from the Separatists, and unwilling to stretch it even further for her own sake._

_"It's because you're with me, isn't it?" She said at last._

_"It's not your fault," Anakin said quickly, "None of this is your fault. These were my orders, that's all. I have no choice but to obey."_

_"If I go with you, then you wouldn't be disobeying any order."_

_"It's too dangerous, Padmé. I can't take you with me."_

_"Well then I'm going to search for her." Her voice was firm and unyielding. "I want to find her, and as my bodyguard, you have to come with me. Orders."_

_Her face was set. She was determined and will not budge on the issue. Anakin, despite his worry for his mother, felt his heart melt at the sight. How could such a beautiful, wonderful woman exist in the galaxy? He felt so privileged to know her, and a smile broke through his defenses and spread across his face._

_"Thank you, Padmé."_

_ooo_

_They landed in the landing pad, and Anakin turned off the engines. Around them was the city, tall skyscrapers reaching to the heavens and plunging below the landing pad in an endless pit. The place was like Coruscant, except everything was run down, a heavy aura of grime and malice coating every brick, and even the sky was fogged with smoke and pollution and the ill will of living sentients.  
_

_He turned to his companion. "Stay here."_

_"I'm going with you," Padmé insisted._

_"This place is very dangerous. I'd feel better if you're here."_

_"I can take care of myself."_

_She was wearing the same determined look._

_"Be very careful," He finally relented, and she nodded. He did not have to say this twice. Nar Shaddaa was about as seedy as they come. The planet had a history of being the gathering area of smugglers, bandits, and other kinds of criminals._

_As they walked down the ramp, Anakin suddenly sensed a presence. He stopped in surprise and shock._

_"What is it?" Padmé asked._

_"It's…" Anakin swallowed and blinked, hardly knowing whether to feel elated or dismayed. "It's my master. He's here."_

_Obi-Wan was looking for Anakin's mother._

_"My master is here."_

_"Is he looking for your mother?"_

_Why else would Obi-Wan be here? He was supposed to be on Kamino._

_"We have to find him."_

_Past the beady eyes that looked their way, through the dark corridors of the building. The filthiest scoundrels of the universe gathered in this place, and yet in the middle was his mother and the man who Anakin thought of as his father. He Force suggested his way through the group of bounty hunters, and emerged in the dank cell that smelled like urine. _

_Obi-Wan was hunched over on the floor, back facing the doorway. He turned around in alarm, his eyes glazed, looking almost feverish. He ignited his lightsaber with one hand, though he did not move to stand._

_"Master?" Anakin breathed, and Padmé pulled to a stop beside him._

_Obi-Wan did not speak, though there was reproach in the crystal orbs. He whipped his head back around, and Anakin saw he was kneeling over the prone form of Shmi Skywalker._

_"Mom!" He ran forward._

_Obi-Wan finally rose, though he swayed, and turned off his lightsaber. Anakin dove down to his mother's body, cradling her head. She was badly beaten, her face swollen and bruised and laced with gashes. Her clothes were torn and caked with dried blood and he could feel her body bend in ways it was not supposed to. Her back. Her back was broken. her arms were broken, her wrists dangled at odd angles, still encased in cuffs. But none of this matters; Anakin came, and Obi-Wan had saved and freed her and everything will be all right.  
_

_"Mom? Mom, it's me, Anakin. It's me, Ani. Mom, wake up! Mom!"_

_She was warm, but she was unresponsive. He did not feel her, in the Force, nor did he feel her heart beat or her lungs expand. As he rocked her, he felt her ribs bend inwards. They were broken, every one. A sob erupted from him. He brushed her blood-soaked hair from her face and bowed his head with an anguished cry of denial.  
_

_"Mom, no!"_

_ooo_

_Anakin and Obi-Wan departed on the ships they arrived in. Padmé went with Anakin and Obi-Wan took Shmi's body. The padawan flew listlessly back to Naboo, remaining in the cockpit even after they entered hyperspace, staring at the screens. Padmé reached out and took his hand and said nothing._

_The rich, vibrant colors of Naboo had grayed after Nar Shaddaa. Everything became flat, and Anakin felt like he was walking through a fake simulation, where beauty was superficial and contained nothing of value. Padmé engaged him in games of strategy, but mostly just sat with him as he brooded. Her presence was a light in his darkness, a calm serenity he could find nowhere else. She was his strength, his courage, a reminder that beautiful things still existed in the world, and in his darkest moments, his love blossomed for her, and he was the young boy of nine years, from a desert where all was yellow and brown and dry, beholding the beautiful handmaiden, fair and fine, an angel from the most beautiful of planets. At length he began to talk again, and the two spoke of many things, of Obi-Wan's constant lectures and Shmi's enviable cooking, the number of escapades at the apartment his mother lived in and the number of stories she read to him at night. _

_They listened to the holonet news announcing the Supreme Chancellor's acceptance of his emergency powers, the battle of Geonosis, and the Republic's declaration of war. Obi-Wan did not contact Anakin, leaving the young couple on their own. The number of Jedi casualties made Padmé pale, and the coming war promised more losses. At length, the Council recalled Anakin from the mission, and Padmé grabbed him by the hand and kissed him before succumbing to tears._

_They were married in clandestine before Anakin departed for Coruscant, surrounded by flowers and the morning sunlight. As the galaxy prepared for war, the lovers murmured their vows and placed their sanctuary in each other's hearts._

_ooo_

_Obi-Wan was in the healing wing when Anakin returned to Coruscant, and his Mon Calamari friend was reprimanding him loudly enough that Anakin could hear her in the hallway outside._

_"His attachments are becoming your attachments, Obi! How many times do you think you can get away with being put on probation? If you hadn't diverted from your mission, maybe the war wouldn't have started. Maybe it would have ended in the Battle of Geonosis. Honestly, how can you be so reckless?"_

_"I was chasing a ghost, Bant. I knew where Shmi was. I didn't even know if Kamino even existed."_

_"And what do you have to show for this? Skywalker still died, we are at war, and you're si—"_

_"He's here," Obi-Wan interrupted, and Anakin reluctantly stepped in._

_Bant threw up her large flippers before moving away, grumbling. She took a tray of hyposprays and slipped past Anakin as she exited the room, leaving the master and padawan alone._

_"Anakin," Obi-Wan stated. He was on the pallet, head propped up with pillows and bacta patches covering his forehead, cheek, and forearm. He looked very pale and tired, with dark circles under his eyes and a grayness about his cheeks. The rest of him was covered in blankets, and Anakin wondered what exactly happened that made Obi-Wan look so…sick._

_"Master."_

_"Come here," Obi-Wan beckoned, and Anakin slowly obeyed. He moved to the side of the bed, where his mentor allowed him to stand in silence for a while._

_"Are you alright?" Anakin asked. "What happened to you?"_

_"Count Dooku," Obi-Wan replied wearily. "I will recover."_

_He did not ask if Anakin was alright. The expression on his face was simply exhausted and despondent. He looked like he wanted to chastise Anakin, no doubt for breaking from his mission and endangering Padmé on Nar Shaddaa, but he did not look like he possessed the will to start any lectures._

_Strangely, Anakin found this more disturbing than if Obi-Wan did. It prompted him to make his apologies before Obi-Wan demanded them.  
_

_"I'm sorry I endangered Padmé."_

_Obi-Wan merely looked away._

_"I know it was wrong of me. I shouldn't have gone after my mother, not when I had a duty as a Jedi. I performed poorly."_

_His master was still silent for a while._

_"I'm sorry, Master." Anakin was getting scared. His master would usually sigh by now, spout out some platitudes and it would be over. Right now, however, Obi-Wan actually seemed to have…given up._

_Given up on what?_

_"You are right," Obi-Wan answered before Anakin could descend further into panic. "You shouldn't have gone to Nar Shaddaa, and certainly you should not have brought the senator. However, it is good that you actually understand, now, and," He paused, "You performed very well afterwards. You adhered to the mission, guarded her from harm, and did not allow your mother's death to distract you from the task."_

_Anakin did not mention that there was nothing his mother's death could distract him from, exactly, and that he had spent most of his time on Naboo grieving and mourning and incapable of doing anything else. There had been nothing on Naboo to defend against, and so he did not so much perform well as perform poorly in a way no one would notice._

_"In light of that," Obi-Wan reached out and took Anakin's hand, "I am proposing to the Council."_

_Anakin blinked, not understanding. "Proposing what?"_

_"For you to take the Trials."_

_A cold lump formed in Anakin's stomach. "Master—"_

_"You are ready," Obi-Wan went on, not looking at him in the eyes, "And I have nothing more to teach you, my padawan."_

_For the last ten years, Anakin had been working for this moment, for the chance to take the Trials and progress to Knighthood. It had been his driving force, his motivation, the reason behind all the lessons and the lightsaber training and missions with Obi-Wan, and even the short, solo missions. It was supposed to be the pinnacle of his career, or at least one of the pinnacles, where he finally becomes a full member of the Order, a fully functional, matured, successful Jedi. Yet somehow, this moment felt more like a failure, a gesture of abandonment, and fear surged in his chest._

_"Master…I'm not ready. I—I'm too young, there's so much I can still learn, and—"_

_"There is nothing more I can teach you," Obi-Wan reiterated, "And the Order needs more knights in the coming war. You will be needed, Anakin, and you will do well."_

_"I'm not ready for the Trials…please Master…"_

_"You are ready." Obi-Wan smiled tiredly at him. "You've been racing ahead to obtain this moment, Anakin. You should be happy that you've reached it."_

_No. No. He was decidedly not happy. It was true, Anakin had been racing ahead. He had been excelling in all of his skills at the lightsaber, and his raw power was formidable and that had led to him striving to outperform his peers…but he had never realized, until this moment, that all his hurrying meant that Obi-Wan could cast him away sooner._

_"Master, please…" Don't do this. Don't throw me away. Don't forsake me. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to disobey you all this time. I didn't mean to endanger Padmé. I didn't mean to go to Nar Shaddaa, to drag you into this, to put you on probation so many times, to put you on probation now—_

_"Don't be frightened, my padawan." My padawan. How bitter those words sounded in his ears, when Obi-Wan had already worked to shape events so that Anakin would no longer be his apprentice. "May the Force be with you."_

_And all other words died before they passed Anakin's lips._


	5. Chapter Five

Filial Piety

Chapter 5

_"You should try to finish it," Said the thirty-six-year-old Mon Calamari._

_"I really can't." Obi-Wan turned away. The tray of food remained hardly touched. He only nibbled a little bit at the starchy tubers, because they were soft and did not make his stomach feel as bad as the vegetables or meat did.  
_

_Bant slammed the table lightly with her flipper, just enough to dispel her frustration with a physical move instead of releasing it to the Force. "Obi-Wan, this is ridiculous. If you can't even do this, how do you expect to complete Thule?"_

_He rubbed his temples wearily. "I'll manage."_

_"At least tell Master Yoda."_

_"No."_

_Bant leaned back, her wide lips twisting a little in a grimace._

_"You're going to get yourself killed."_

_"I'll be fine, Bant," From the corner of his eye, Obi-Wan saw a familiar blonde visage entering the cafeteria, "And keep your voice down."_

_Bant's large eyes flickered once to note who he saw. Her features darkened with her mood.  
_

_"You shouldn't have knighted him."_

_"He passed his trials."_

_"This isn't about _him_ it's about _you_. And another thing; most padawans stay with their masters for a while after they're knighted."_

_Obi-Wan did not reply; Anakin was approaching. He held his breath as his former padawan came to a stop at their table. Bant sat up straight to regard the young man, as Obi-Wan continued staring down into his plate, pretending he was eating, even though he was certain anyone could see through the ruse._

_"Hello, Knight Skywalker," Bant greeted with a slightly false cheer. "How are you today?"_

_"I am well, thank you, Master Eerin. How are you?"_

_"I am well. How was your last mission? I heard it was smooth."_

_"It was."_

_An awkward silence fell, but Obi-Wan did not look up. He could sense his former padawan stretching out, seeking him, but kept his shields tight and his face down. It was better this way, whatever Anakin might think of it. Under the table, his left hand gripped the folds of his tunic in a tight clench, and he was glad for the beard that hid how his jaws clenched with effort._

_After what seemed like an eternity, Anakin finally gave up. It seemed the youngster was starting to learn to take a hint, even if it was slow learning._

_"Good day to you both, Master Eerin, Master Kenobi."_

_"Good day, Knight Skywalker," Bant nodded at him._

_Anakin's bright, strong presence finally left, and Obi-Wan slumped back._

_"You're a fool," Bant hissed viciously, "Would it be so terrible to let him know—"_

_"Yes," Obi-Wan glared, and he suddenly felt cold and clammy. The sides his face was thinly covered with cold sweat. "I don't want Anakin involved."_

_"Why not?" The Mon Calamari was furious, though she made sure to keep her voice down in the public area. "Is this some misplaced pride I've never detected in you before? Or are you actually angry at him? Because Force, I have to say I can't tell the difference!"_

_"I'm not angry at him."_

_"Well you sure are behaving as if you are."_

_"Why would I make him a Jedi Knight if I am angry at him?"_

_"To keep him away from you," Bant folded her flippers. "Which you are doing quite well, at the expense of everyone else's comfort."_

_"I wouldn't make him a knight if he weren't ready."_

_"No one is questioning whether he is ready," Bant hissed, "Skywalker is doing very well as a knight, in fact—much better than he did under your tutelage, but _you _aren't doing nearly half as well without him."_

_"This has nothing to do with him."_

_"This has everything to do with him, you dolt. Don't tell me you went to Nar Shaddaa for _yourself_."_

_"Shmi Skywalker was my friend, Bant."_

_"Yes, but the only reason you would abandon your current mission for her sake is because she was Skywalker's mother. Honestly, we thought you were insane; how could you expect to teach your padawan about attachments if you keep on encouraging them like this? But the ironic thing is rather than hurting Skywalker the way we all expected, you've managed to hurt _yourself_!"_

_Obi-Wan heaved a sigh of annoyance and stood, but came face to face with Siri. He had not even sensed her arrival._

_"Obi-Wan," She murmured, "You look pale."_

_"Stubborn rancor," Bant seethed._

_Obi-Wan released another exasperated sigh. "I need to head to the archives to look something up."_

_"He needs rest and he knows it," Bant glared at Siri, "Perhaps you can talk some sense into him. The Jedi Council should also know better than to assign him—"_

_"Are you not feeling well?" Siri asked._

_"I am feeling fine," Obi-Wan wondered whether they were making a scene, though he did not manage to get a good look at the rest of the cafeteria. "I do not need _rest_ but I _do _need to go to the archives. Ladies," He inclined his head, and took leave of them._

_ooo_

_It was late at night when Obi-Wan returned to his quarters. He walked through the halls with a hunched over back and huddled arms. The nocturnal Jedi looked at him curiously, some of them remarking on his identity, a few acknowledging him as Obi-Wan Kenobi, "The Negotiator" and "Master of that headstrong padawan". He ignored all this and briskly walked, not stopping until he reached the doors to his apartments._

_After ten years of living with a young, vibrant boy, and thirteen years prior of living with an elder, wise master, the rooms felt cold and empty even after the few months of adjustment. There was no sense that another living being was here; Anakin's things had been cleared out and many surfaces were laid bare. There was no comforting knowledge that there was another person in the neighboring room, sleeping, and no need to tiptoe to allow him to rest. Anakin's room was, for once, clean and tidy and completely devoid of everything that identified it._

_Against his better judgment, Obi-Wan trudged through, looking around the living room, the kitchen, behind the counter, the walls that would block his view from the doorway. He then opened the doors to his own bedroom and peered in, then stepped out to look in what use to be Anakin's room. Then he looked in the bathroom, turning on the light, before turning it off again and stepping back out. What was he doing? He was looking for something, someone, but he was not sure if he was looking for a tall, elder man, a short, young child, or a slender, elegant youth. It did not matter, in the end. He was alone, as he knew he was all along._

_It was better this way. In one's hour of death, all are alone, and Obi-Wan was dying a slow, gradual, relentless death. He had accepted it, long ago, but he knew Anakin would not. Anakin was never good at accepting what he did not like._

_And Obi-Wan did not need his denial._

_It was enough that Anakin was now a knight, that the boy Obi-Wan took under his wing had grown and fledged and left the nest. If Obi-Wan accomplished nothing else, at least he accomplished this. He had watched and led a young slave boy from the ignominy of Tatooine grow into the Hero With No Fear. History will remember Anakin Skywalker as the greatest Jedi that ever lived._

_As a mentor…as a brother and father and friend, Obi-Wan was content. It was enough._

_He thought he was tired enough to drop into bed and fall asleep instantly, but as he changed into his sleepclothes, a wave of nausea overcame him. He ran into the bathroom and lifted the toiletbowl just in time to start retching into it. Obi-Wan had not eaten much for dinner, but more and more kept pouring out of his mouth, bile, acid that burned at his tongue and teeth and gums, mixed with thick, viscous, liquid copper that stained the white edges dark. It went on and on, and by the time he finally stopped, his arms were about to collapse from supporting him and he felt dizzy and drained. Reaching out to the Force proved fruitless; he derived no strength from it, and he allowed himself to fall to the side, onto the cold floor._

_He did not get up until morning._

_ooo_

_"White hair, you have now," Yoda poked at thirty-eight-year-old Obi-Wan's temple. "Unwell, you are."_

_"I am fine," He insisted, but the Grand Master shook his head._

_"Unclear, your presence is, but sense, I do: unwell for some time, you have been."_

_Unwell for two years, but that was neither here nor there._

_"The war had…taken a lot out of me."_

_"Your fault, this war is not," Yoda suddenly said. "Nar Shaddaa or Kamino, no difference would they make to the galaxy. Wish, I do, however, that gone to Kamino you had."_

_Obi-Wan said nothing._

_"Go to Jabiim, I wish you would not." The ancient Jedi continued. "My assignment, it was not. Strong enough for the mission, you are not."_

_"I can hardly refuse a mission during these times, Master Yoda," Obi-Wan laughed lightly at how preposterous the idea sounded, but Yoda seemed less amused._

_"Hmph!" Said the old Jedi, "Careful, you must be, young Kenobi." A clawed hand took his own. "Trade you for the Chosen One, our intention, it was not. Qui-Gon Jinn's intention, it was not. Send you with Skywalker, we should."_

_"No." Obi-Wan tugged his hand away. "I don't want to work with Anakin."_

_"Two years since his knighting," Yoda moved his hoverchair around, "And not one mission, did you two partner on. Angry with him, you are, others say. However, think, I do, that rather, hiding from him, you are. Wish to keep something from him, you do."_

_"He is no longer my padawan. I am no longer his master. There is no need to assign us to the same missions."_

_"No need, there is, to separate you two either."_

_"I won't work with him," Said Obi-Wan, turning. "Either send Anakin or me, but I won't go with him."_

_In a bold move that was no doubt due to Anakin's influence, the Jedi Master left Yoda in the hall without so much as a goodbye._

_ooo_

_"General! We're surrounded!"_

_"Assemble the defense formation!" Obi-Wan shouted, turning on his lightsaber. For a moment, the Force wavered precariously, and he nearly dropped his weapon in alarm. He ducked just in time to avoid a blaster bolt straight to his head._

_He lifted his blade and began deflecting shots. The air sizzled with burning plasma. The mud of the planet dragged at his boots, making it difficult to walk, and a desperation rose within him as he saw the soldiers fall._

_Force, this mission had been a disaster. Jabiim was a small planet, and should have been easy to maintain, but they had not been prepared to deal with its harsh terrains. Through brute effort, Obi-Wan and Nercuna had been able to press the battles forward, but then Nercuna had been shot and killed, leaving only Obi-Wan to handle the assignment. This would have been fine as well, except the stress had started to interfere with Obi-Wan's connection to the Force, and once again he was vomiting blood every time he ingested anything._

_His strength was waning. Yoda was right. He should not have led this mission. The Council should have sent Anakin; even if Obi-Wan was the better leader and strategist, at least Anakin would make it through the assignment…_

_Out of the folds came a slender, dark wraith, eyes blazing yellow like fire and lips twisted into an ever-present sneer. Her Force presence was foreboding, choking smoke and grease of hate, wafting toward him as she sought out his presence. He shied, certain that he could not face her. He was feeling so sick. The Force was elusive and as he deflected another bolt, his stomach clenched and he retched, blood spitting from his mouth in sprays. All of the sudden, he had a terrible premonition that he was not going to make it out of this battle. He should have listened to Bant. He should not have accepted Jabiim._

_The sound of lightsabers whirling resonated near his ear and he spun away just in time to avoid twin strikes. Asajj Ventress did not hesitate, diving in for another blow. Obi-Wan caught both blades with his own and pushed back. He managed to control his gag reflex long enough to retreat backwards, but the splatter of blood came out, some spraying onto Ventress's face._

_The acolyte paused, and time seemed to slow as she raised one hand, still holding the lightsaber, to her face to wipe at the drops of blood. She looked at her hand, as if fascinated, and turned her smoldering eyes to Obi-Wan, dark glee shimmering in those yellowed orbs._

_"Not feeling so well, are we?" She sneered. "The Great Negotiator…the Council is quite bold to believe you can handle this assignment. Or perhaps…" She paused, "Perhaps they do not…know?"_

_Obi-Wan did not remember reacting, but apparently he affirmed what she said, for Ventress suddenly lifted her head and released an echoing, maniacal laugh._

_"Pathetic!" She hissed, and was upon him in endless blows. Desperation alone allowed Obi-Wan to deflect her strikes, and to its credit he lasted a good hour against her, but eventually his strength waned and his will was constantly distracted by his malaise, as well as the chokes of blood. Eventually the world turned upside down and sideways, the blaster bolts began flying vertically, vertigo making him lose sense of orientation and the only thing solid was the ground against his body and pressed against his face._

I am going to die today,_ Obi-Wan thought, and his mind suddenly traveled to a place far away where he imagined a blonde-haired youth was. Anakin might be reading datapads right now, or talking to the clonetroopers. He wondered if enough time had passed for the master-padawan bond between them to fade. Otherwise, if he died, Anakin would sense it…and for some reason, doubtless unbecoming of a Jedi, Obi-Wan did not want Anakin to know his hour of death._

_During the brief second between the sharp pain and loss of consciousness, Obi-Wan had just enough time to think that the agony came from the wrong part of his body—that it should not be the back of his head but his heart or his neck or his stomach. Then all was nothing._


	6. Chapter Six

Filial Piety

Chapter Six

_Anakin could barely recognize his master. There was nothing familiar about the twitching, jerking body on the cot. The man was completely silent, unable to scream, a wide tube originating from the frame of the bed arched over his head and stuck down his throat, holding his head to the cot, trapping him there. His eyes were those of a madman, wild and glassy as if blind. His body thrashed with powerful spasms, constantly attempting to curl in on itself. He swallowed against the Force collar around his neck and whatever was in his throat, breathing hard through his nostrils, constantly choking and gagging. Wrists and ankles pulled at the restraints, body matted with blood and dirt. The man was so emaciated, Anakin could practically see his intestines in the holly of his belly._

_"Keep it together," Anakin heard Master Windu warn, "Keep it together, Knight."_

_Anakin was not sure how he could, more than he was, anyway. He was frozen, pieces of himself balancing precariously, the slightest shake would send him tumbling down. Obi-Wan continued to jerk as the clones examined the bed. They did not free him._

_"He's held down to the cot. We can't remove him," One of the soldiers announced._

_"In addition to the restraints, you mean?"_

_"Yes sir."_

_Master Windu moved Anakin back. Anakin obeyed, because he was exerting too much effort simply keeping his wits together._

_"It's up inside," The clones said as Master Windu bent over Obi-Wan's legs, "We have no idea how deep it goes."_

_Master Windu took a shuddering breath, and it was the greatest loss of composure Anakin had ever witnessed from him. "Asajj Ventress is a disturbed young woman." He gestured at the Force collar. "Remove that first. It will help calm him down."_

_"Yes sir."_

_The dark-skinned Jedi turned to Anakin as a soldier went out to retrieve an engineer. "Knight Skywalker."_

_He said nothing else._

_Anakin reached up to scratch at his head. "Haha," He laughed mirthlessly, "I guess the good news is that he'll probably be more open to taking me on missions with him." Tears rolled down his cheeks. Unbecoming of a man. Thankfully, Mace Windu seemed disposed to ignore this._

_"He's a stubborn son of a bantha. Don't get too expectant."_

_"This wouldn't have happened if I was there."_

_"No, it wouldn't."_

_"He _knew _he was sick. Yoda _knew _he was sick. Someone should have stopped him." Obi-Wan grunted again, completely unaware of his surroundings, and his body thumped against the cot in vain as he jerked and seized. Anakin wanted to grab him and never let go, but he did not know where he could hold Obi-Wan that would not hurt him further. The man looked _brittle_, as if he were made of things that would shatter with the slightest touch, even though he was jerking with enough force to dislocate all of his limbs._

_"Keep it together, Knight."_

_"Stop telling me to keep it together! You're not helping!"_

_The older Jedi placed a hand on Anakin's shoulder. "I'm sorry," He apologized, "That was for my sake too."_

_Anakin looked up at him blearily, and managed a nod. Any more than that and he would start screaming. He had no idea how Obi-Wan would react to that._

_The engineers arrived, hurrying to Obi-Wan's side to look at the Force collar. They had to turn it around, which meant lifting his head and neck, something that caused Obi-Wan to thrash even more desperately as the cruel pipe lodged deeper into his throat. Master Windu held Anakin's arm in a death grip, and it served to ground him in a way no words could. The pain was a good pain. It gave him something to focus on besides the horror in front of his eyes._

_With a final click, the collar opened, and Anakin felt Obi-Wan's Force presence swell. It was pathetically weak, barely there, but he grabbed onto it, interlacing it with his own signature, the way he and his master use to bond when he was still a padawan. Obi-Wan responded but grabbing onto him. It felt like his very soul was weeping._

Anakin. Anakin.

Master. I am here.

Anakin. Darkness. Pain.

_Brushing past the other Jedi and the clones, Anakin bent over his master's head and pressed his forehead against Obi-Wan's. The bones of his forehead were hard, the skin tight and wet with sweat and grime. He was trembling on the cot, still gagging and choking and utterly exhausted._

_"Get this out of his throat," Anakin commanded. He stepped back and noticed it was attached to the frame. With a flick of the lightsaber, he severed the pipe. Obi-Wan screamed through the Force and his limbs thrashed against the restraints as Anakin slowly pulled it out, but Master Windu took over when he hesitated. Panting, Obi-Wan went limp once his head was freed and coughed, violently, until he passed out, his throat reflexes still choking on the sudden rush of air._

_He remained unconscious when they freed him from the bed, and Anakin barely understood why Master Windu used a lightsaber at the lower end of the cot to sever something there. The clones moved him to a stretcher and Anakin stayed by his side. They made it out of the dungeons past the other clones looking through empty cells._

_"Good man, Obi-Wan," Master Windu whispered to the unconscious Jedi. Anakin looked around and thought numbly that he would have preferred if Obi-Wan had been the one to get away instead of the other prisoners. Perhaps if he had not freed everyone, Asajj Ventress would not have been so sick in her torture._

_Then again, she was a Sith scum._

_"We got him, Knight Skywalker," Mace Windu then turned to Anakin, "Things will only improve from now on. Focus on that."_

_The younger Jedi nodded._

_ooo_

_Healing wings were often quiet places, but as Anakin exited the lifts, he could hear yelling and the sound of something being thrown._

_"Stupid! Stupid! You are a sith-cursed _idiot!_ Just try me!"_

_There was more shouting, this time a cacophony of voices, all far more irate than Jedi ever were. When he circled around, he saw Obi-Wan lying on his side, facing away from Healer Eerin, Master Muln, Master Tachi, who all looked ready to explode if they had not already, while Yoda, Windu, and Shaak Ti stood quietly behind the younger three._

_"Don't you turn your back on us, Obi-Wan Kenobi!"_

_Obi-Wan's eyes were shut, and he looked sick and skinny, the bones of his skull still protruding and parts of his scalp still bare from where hair had either fallen out or had been torn out. Anakin brushed past the other Jedi wordlessly, not caring about appearances, and knelt by his master's side. It was the closest he had ever come to his master since his knighting, and for a moment he felt overwhelmed.  
_

_"Master, are you alright?"_

_"Maybe Anakin can talk some sense into him. Now that he's finally unable to avoid him."_

_Obi-Wan opened his eyes and looked at Anakin solemnly. "Why are you here?" He rasped. His voice sounded like his vocal cords had decayed to thin strands._

_Ignoring the pang of deep hurt the question caused, Anakin murmured, "Because I care about you, and I wanted to know how you are."_

_Obi-Wan suddenly coughed, heaving violently, and Anakin looked up for a glass of water. Healer Eerin handed it to him, nearly spilling the cup on her flippers. He tipped the water into his master's mouth and Obi-Wan drank weakly, long lashes fluttering sleepily against his cheeks before his eyes closed completely. Anakin set the glass down on the tray nearby._

_"Think, I do," Yoda said finally, "That some privacy, these two need. Come, elsewhere, we need to be."_

_There were so many questions, so many accusations, so many things Anakin wanted to say, but it has been years and Obi-Wan was exhausted. The young knight pulled up a chair but did not voice any of his thoughts, instead tucking his master in and allowing him to rest for a while. Obi-Wan's body was still wrecked with tremors, but his shields had fallen completely and Anakin caught glimpses of emotion. In his dreams, Obi-Wan did not know he was supposed to be angry at his former padawan. His master felt safe with him here, wanted him to be here, to stay, to watch over him. Happily, the nightmares of Jabiim did not seem to invade his mind in the healing wing._

_Three hours later, no one had disturbed the two of them, and Obi-Wan woke. He blinked at Anakin in confusion, before his face distorted in pain. The painkillers apparently had worn off._

_Healer Eerin gave Anakin the painkillers, with brusque instructions on how to inject them, but left him to do it himself. Obi-Wan watched, still seizing with tremors, and said nothing as Anakin loaded and injected. The two waited in silence as the painkillers did their work._

_"You should go," Obi-Wan said at last, "I'll be fine here."_

_Since his knighthood, he had avoided Anakin. They nearly lost all chances of reconciliation. Anakin was not going to let him get away that easily.  
_

_"I have nowhere else to be." He said equally quietly. "And I want to know why you hate me so much."_

_Obi-Wan did not reply._

_"I know I was a pain when I was your padawan," Anakin rubbed his face, "But you didn't even give me an ultimatum, anything. You wouldn't even give me a chance to make it up to you."_

_"Anakin, not everything is about you."_

_"Well it sure looks that way. It seems like everyone knows what's up with you except me." Anakin looked away. "You know, when I was a padawan, I wanted to be a knight, sure, so that you would quit giving me all those lectures and treating me like a stupid child, but I always thought the two of us would…I don't know. We made a cool pair, we were great together, and I didn't think that part had to change. And I didn't think you were so anxious for that to change either. I always thought the world of you, no matter what I did—I was rude and impulsive and insensitive because I _trusted _you, and you never gave me reason to believe that you were holding that against me. I thought you liked me."_

_"Anakin…" Obi-Wan's body jerked again, and he grimaced with an effort to control the spasms, "Anakin…"_

_He looked at the younger man, and his voice trembled, "I'm dying, Anakin."_

_Anakin did not react to this. He had no idea what he was talking about._

_"I don't know how to explain it," His master went on, "But I've been sick ever since…ever since your mother died. I asked the healers and they don't know what's going on. All Bant could tell me was that it's happening to my very Force presence, and there's no way to stop it or slow it. It's not affecting my force powers yet, but it will at some point, and when this runs its course I'll…I'll be gone."_

_"…What are you saying?"_

_"I'm dying, Anakin," Obi-Wan said again. "You—you can feel it, if you try. Look."_

_His shields were down. Anakin found himself reluctant to press. A deep worry gnawed at his gut, a sense of foreboding, that whatever he finds will shatter him, shatter them all, and there was no way to collect the pieces, no way to prevent this from happening. But Obi-Wan's gaze was forceful, and Anakin will always be his padawan at heart. He surged forward at Obi-Wan's signature._

_Lights, memories, feelings, a myriad of colors and music, but Anakin drew back, shuddering. His master's force presence has decayed. He saw spots and tatters, crumbling integrity. The Dark Side was leeching upon it, tearing at it from another side of the Force, one that Anakin could not fight in. Shuddering, he jolted back in his chair, staring at his master in horror._

_"Master, what—Master I don't understand—"_

_"I am dying, Anakin," Obi-Wan was tired and he could not keep his eyes open. "That is all there is to understand."_

_"No. No. No, I won't lose you too you're like a _father _to me—"_

_"Anakin!" Obi-Wan coughed, his body jerking, and to the youth's horror, blood speckled at the white sheets. "This," His master rasped, "Is precisely why I didn't want you near."_

_Anakin fell silent, frozen._

_"This isn't a battle you can fight, Padawan," Obi-Wan reached out to take his limp hand, "And believe me, I have been fighting it for a long time. Years. It has been catching up with me at last. We all die, Anakin."_

_"No."_

_"We do, Padawan," And Anakin fell silent at this endearment. "We all die and I have sensed my death approaching for a long time. I didn't want you to see me like this. I didn't want you to…deny it. I didn't want to have to convince you to accept this because it is tiring, Padawan, tiring to have to teach, to nurture, to care about you, to love you, and then become the cause of your pain, and I knew that if you knew about this you will always think you failed me in the end, no matter what I say or do. I am so tired, Padawan."_

_"No. I'm not losing you too." His master was not listening. "We'll figure it out, whatever this, this is. Please. You can't just give up." Desperation welled from his eyes and he blinked before he realized he was supposed to be holding back his tears, not succumbing to them. He grabbed at his master's hands and squeezed tightly, as if Obi-Wan's life were something he could physically hold on to. "Please. You can't just give up—Force, you've never given up before—"_

_"You don't know that," Obi-Wan said softly, and he refused to look at him. "You don't know what I have given up."_

_The younger man dissolved into his tears, clutching his master's hands tightly, feeling like even though his Master was here he was still losing him, and somehow it was worse because his presence was tantalizing, a mockery, and there was no escape from the memories of when Anakin had been a naïve, ignorant, foolish padawan, completely unaware of the sacrifices his master had to make for him._

_"Anakin…"_

_Obi-Wan was weak, but he struggled to sit up. He pulled gently at Anakin's blonde locks, and the young Knight instantly threw himself onto his Master, grabbing him tightly. The older Jedi sighed, before wrapping his own arms around the knight, and after a while all was quiet, just the two of them breathing as they held each other. Anakin had not felt so safe, so comforted, since the whole mess with Nar Shaddaa and his mother's death. Part of him wondered if this was a dream. It seemed equal parts beautiful and nightmarish. Obi-Wan's very Force signature was decaying. How did one go about curing that?  
_

_In the distance, a woman's voice echoed in the halls._

_"I'm sorry, Senator Amidala. Master Kenobi is not ready for visitors."_

_"Has Knight Skywalker seen him yet? I know he has been worried," His wife replied._

_"Yes, Senator. We have all been."_

_"Very good then. Will you tell Master Kenobi that I dropped by? Will it be alright if I came by tomorrow?"_

_"Certainly, milady."_

_Anakin slowly pulled back, but did not let go of his master. "Promise me you'll fight."_

_Obi-Wan looked frankly miserable, but he nodded._

_"We'll all help," Anakin squeezed him, "You're not alone. We're all here for you. I'm glad you're here. I'm glad I can be here for you. Promise me you won't go on any more missions until we figure something out."_

_"I can't promise that."_

_"Master."_

_"Anakin."_

_"If you don't do everything you possibly can…I won't forgive you."_

_"I'm a Jedi, Anakin, and everything has an end."_

_"It's not your time."_

_"It's not your call."_

_"And it's not yours either."_

_He was silent._

_"You've taken care of me for…" Anakin shook his head, "You were a brother, a father, a friend. The things you've done for me, for my mother—they're things I can never repay, but please, don't leave me stranded like this. Don't—don't push me away. If…if you die in the end, if you had to leave, at least I'd know I've done all I can."_

_"There is a war going on, Anakin. I can't just sit in the Temple while the rest of you sacrifice yourselves."_

_He was right. He would probably go stir-crazy too, if he were trapped here while everyone else is dying._

_Anakin exhaled heavily. "Then at least let me be your partner. Don't go on solo missions. Take me with you. Master Yoda—he said you always refused. I—I know you were doing that so I wouldn't know—but it's all out in the open now. No more of this, alright, Master? We made a good team once. Once you're better, at least let me watch your back."_

_Obi-Wan's wise eyes regarded him steadily, and Anakin was aware that he must present a pathetic visage, eyes red and swollen, sniffling, cheeks damp, lips tight. He never felt less like a Jedi, but he also never felt closer to his Master. Obi-Wan's shields were still down, his strength still dissipated from the torture he endured under Ventress's imprisonment, and he could sense his master's emotions. Pain. Sorrow. Fear. Love. Part of Anakin wondered how Obi-Wan could be so calm about going out into the field again. He had suffered indignities, horrors, at the hands of the Sith acolyte._

_"If I fall on the field, you will blame yourself."_

_"I already do." Anakin trembled._

_Obi-Wan gently squeezed his hands, and Anakin had a sense that his master was traumatized enough from his ordeal to be a little frightened of going out solo again. Anakin had taken advantage of his master's weak moment. He pressed the advantage._

_"I can watch your back and you can watch mine. It'll make the missions a lot bearable. You can lecture me all you want. I'll even listen to some. It's nice to have company, Master. Don't you miss that?"_

_A wry smile. "Yes."_

_"Yes? And if Ventress ever shows up, she won't be a match for the two of us together."_

_"No, she won't."_

_"I missed you, Obi-Wan. Don't you miss me?"_

_"Of course I do."_

_"Then promise me you won't go on a mission without me."_

_Obi-Wan did not lose all of his faculties. "I'm going to regret this once I've recovered."_

_"That's why I'm asking now."_

_"Hm." Obi-Wan's lips tightened. "You don't play fair. I'm very tired, Anakin."_

_"Promise me."_

_"Promise me that you won't grieve too much if I fall. It's only a matter of time."_

_Anakin pressed his forehead against Obi-Wan's at that. How much grief is too much? "You won't fall."_

_"Please, Padawan."_

_Anakin nodded after a while. "So, partners again?"_

_"Alright."_

_When silence fell again, Obi-Wan's breathing deepened, and Anakin realized he was asleep.  
_


	7. Chapter Seven

Filial Piety

Chapter Seven

"_Darsant Avat_, it was called, at least among spirits," The ghost said quietly, "It stands for '_Plague of Forces'_. Every time the Dark Side takes over the galaxy, it has to do so in both the realm of the living and the realm of the Force itself, or else everything would remain essentially the same. Plenty of things kill, you know. Jedi kill their share as well. Rogue Jedi, Sith, civil wars, interplanetary wars, caused by political feuds, these all cause a lot of death and grief, but you don't get the kind of upheaval you see today simply through death. It has to happen on all dimensions, at the same time, and in the Force, it is a battle waged by the energies, light versus dark, healing versus destruction. Usually it's a general thing, not too concentrated in any particular area, and it doesn't really affect people, but somehow…I don't know. Sometimes I still wonder if I was really the Chosen One, or if it had been you all along."

The tea was warm in Obi-Wan's hands, but he did not raise the cup to drink. He watched the ghost muse silently for a while, twisting his fingers nervously. There was a palpable sense of sadness, of opportunities lost and words left unsaid, things that had happened and yet did not, old hurts reopened, old wounds seeping.

"It turned out, the Dark Side latched onto you on your thirteenth birthday. You looked really appealing, I guess, and it's…no wonder, really. You were always the best Jedi, good, kind, different. Even I knew there was something special about you, though I thought it only figured. Twelve was also the age when your powers went through a growth spurt of sorts, which is normal, I mean, that's why thirteen is such an important age—if you weren't chosen by a master you weren't trained because by then your powers have stabilized. Either way, the Dark Side began to gnaw at you, like an infection. You fought it off well, all the way up till Shmi died and you had to face Dooku. By that time it had worn away enough of your defenses that when you fought a Sith Lord, the exertion of that battle, the Force reserves you depleted, was just enough for you to cross the threshold. You became physically ill. The healers checked you over and discovered that much of your Force signature had already been shredded, and there was nothing for them to do because they were on this side, the living side,and what was eating away at you—that was literally Death itself."

"So I was dying," Obi-Wan said slowly, "And…you went back to change history, because of that?" He doubted Anakin's affection for him was so complete. Perhaps this version of himself had been too indulgent with the boy and his attachments.

"If it makes you feel better, the galaxy still fell apart. Palpatine still took over and slaughtered a lot of Jedi. At the time…I still married Padmé. I told you, later, when she got pregnant and I panicked. You weren't pleased, of course, but I think by then you were too ill to really care. You were miserable all the time, and we did go on a few missions together but by then you were so sick you couldn't go anymore." He smiled wistfully. "I was really happy, honestly, because I thought if you stayed at the temples you wouldn't be captured again. Figured a miserable master was better than a dead one. But you weren't well at all. You vomited blood every day, even on the good days, and sometimes when you sleep you were so still, both your body and your Force signature, that I was afraid that you were dead."

As Obi-Wan listened, he felt he could remember that surreal lifetime, days confined to the bed, unable to make his own way to the refresher, choking back screams of shame and frustration, wondering when Anakin suddenly became so patient and so understanding. It was never an old man's wish to burden the young, and he felt like he was holding Anakin back when Anakin should be free to fly, free to go. Obi-Wan was in the past, and should die with it, but Anakin was too stubborn, clung on too tightly, and always looked stricken and forsaken whenever Obi-Wan even hinted of giving up.

So the older Jedi Master did not.

"Did you fall?" He asked out loud.

"To the Dark Side? Yes."

Obi-Wan stared.

"You're a good pilot," Anakin explained, "And you had a connection to the Unifying Force. Padmé visited all the time once you learned she was pregnant with the twins, and then one day she wanted to go home to Theed. That time…none of us knew Palpatine was the Sith Lord, just like in this life. I was the fancy Chosen One and he wanted me as his apprentice and chose to target my wife in order to attack my vulnerability, my attachments. He would have targeted you, but she was easier, and she was a secret, which made it more effective if he busted her. You didn't know the details, obviously, but you did sense she was in danger and somehow tricked everyone into thinking you wanted to visit Naboo to relax. Since you're always right, the ship was attacked. You sent Padmé in an escape pod and faced Dooku yourself."

A pang of overwhelming despair palpitated in the hut. The ghost looked down at his hands. Once again, Obi-Wan could see, Padmé with her swelling stomach, eager to show Obi-Wan her family the way she had shown Anakin years ago. _"You are as much a father and brother to me as you were to Ani," _She assured him, _"Naboo is a beautiful planet, and perhaps a change of scenery is exactly what you need to get better. You are so smart! How can anyone recuperate on Coruscant, with its congested skyways and the metropolis covering every inch of the surface? Sometimes the best medicine is as simple as nature." _All the while, Obi-Wan tried to hide his unease, sensing danger drawing ever closer and unable to pinpoint why; his sight was as clouded as Yoda's was, and all he could do was wait and pray that when the time came he could protect his padawan's wife, because if he did not Anakin would be consumed with despair and Obi-Wan would never be able to forgive himself. Then shouting, blaster fire, yelling at Padmé to get into the escape pod, slamming the doors shot while the woman pounded on the windows, screaming for him. _Aren't you coming? No! Obi-Wan! No stop open this door! _More blaster fire, watching her eject, shooting back at the ships, at Count Dooku, watching the pod blast into hyperspace as he was abruptly pulled into the tractor beam. Dooku yelling at the droids to search the ship for the Senator, having missed her escape because of all the blasters and cannons, and then turning a deadly eye on Obi-Wan, who could only feel the sense of profound triumph that Padmé had escaped, even as misery and despair clouded his future in darkness.

"He tortured you for _months_, trying to figure out where Padmé went. It was like Ventress all over again, but this time…you didn't make it. You were still alive when I found you, but you didn't survive long after. Padmé died in childbirth because the conditions were poor where she went and under such circumstances, she didn't have even decent medical care, but the babies were healthy. I was able to hold them before I heard word that you were located. I slew the bastard, the count, myself. Scissored his head right off. I was so angry." The ghost looked away. "I lost my mother, my wife, and my father. I went back to the twins and all I could think was that their mother should have been there with them, that you should have been there with me. Then Palpatine told me he was the Sith Lord, thinking I would join him. Killed him too, but I guess I did end up joining after all. Once you start hating, it becomes all that you are, and it was easier to hate than to grieve."

Unable to sip his tea, Obi-Wan set the cup on the table.

"Later on…when I finally died…I thought I would find you in the Force. But I didn't. You weren't there anymore. _Darsant Avat._ The Dark Side had consumed you completely, had eaten you away. You didn't exist. Qui-Gon was devastated, everyone was devastated…I couldn't stand that someone like you could be collateral damage to powerplay between the two sides of the Force. You didn't exist. Everyone else did." Anakin looked tearfully at him. "So you see, I had to go back and change things. Qui-Gon already booked his own timeline beforehand, before meeting you, ever, so he couldn't come. That's another story all together, and would just make this more confusing, but I had to go back because the Dark Side must take over anyway, Palpatine had to conduct the Purge, and I had to fall—all these things have to happen anyway, but I had to make sure you didn't fall to _Darsant Avat_. One detail. That was all."

"And how did you prevent that, exactly?"

"Growth spurt. Before your thirteenth birthday, you had a growth spurt. It happens on its own, but the amount can be increased if you suffered stress during that time. I had to put you in danger, or in a situation where you thought you were in danger, so you could pull on the Force which would then cause you to be stronger. Near-death experience would quadruple your vitality. After that, when the Dark Side leeches on, you'd have enough that you wouldn't actually fall sick, and if you die before your signature disappears you would still be around. Otherwise, in the first version, for example, Qui-Gon was just too good at protecting you. He really adored you, in all timelines really, though a bit less in this one but only because he didn't admit it to himself. Either way, you didn't experience the emotional stress that comes with being in danger during that timeframe, so you never boosted your vitality."

Bandomeer. That whole story around Bandomeer, around Xanatos, that had been for him. Obi-Wan still remembered the taste of desperation in the back of his throat. It was the first time his life had been in danger, the first time he left the safety of Coruscant's Jedi Temple, and he had thought that even if he had not been good enough to be chosen as a padawan, perhaps he could still die nobly as a Jedi, and it was that one thought that kept the sickening fear at bay. He had been frightened, and deeply ashamed of his fear. He could see how Qui-Gon's love for him would have prevented the entire terrible ordeal. Somewhere in the Force was the lingering memory of another Qui-Gon, another Obi-Wan, and they were…happy together. Qui-Gon had found him when he was nine, drawn by his laughter and his presence in the Force—_"It was bright, like a new star, not at its most shining, but so new, and I could not resist coming to take a look and there you were, a child…"_ This Qui-Gon was more of a father than the one he remembered, more in tune with Obi-Wan's feelings and talents—_"Padawan, sometimes nightmares are just nightmares, and the scarier they are the less chance they are real…talk to me and we will see what fears you have that brought them to your dreams…" _He always spoke to others of Obi-Wan with pride, even when Obi-Wan had not been present—_"Your master always speaks highly of you. Just yesterday when we were supposed to be relaxing in my quarters after the spar, he talked nonstop about all of your achievements. I just wanted you to know that this is all your fault and we're all looking for a padawan that we can torment Qui-Gon with the same way", "Never stops, your master's talk! Always, 'Obi-Wan accomplishes this', 'Obi-Wan accomplishes that'. Talk one's ears off, he can! Need bigger head, you do not!"_

His master in this lifetime had never been so proud of him. He had been determined not to like Obi-Wan from the start. Even now, decades later, the old Jedi could feel the painful yearning to please the venerable master, only to fall short every time.

_You do realize it was because of him and not you, right? _

"It was a downright pain trying to get it just right. Yoda wasn't lying when he said Qui-Gon and you were destined for each other. It worked out though, that mission to Bandomeer and Xanatos—it all worked out beautifully, and here you are, not sick anymore." Anakin leaned forward. "Do you understand now, Master?"

Understand what, exactly? That he was alive and that everyone else had perished? That Anakin had become Vader, Padmé died in misery, and the twins were now separated and doomed to live without their parents?

"No. I don't understand why everything else had to stay the same. You—you could have changed more."

"Ah," Anakin smiled, unconcerned, "Yes, lots of Jedi died, lots of people died, and there is great suffering in the galaxy, but the Dark Side of the Force exists for a reason, and it isn't because of its tenacity. There are plenty of things that want to survive, and what determines that is not so much its strength as its usefulness. Nothing in this universe exists without a purpose. Whether it is to be prey or eat prey, everything exists for a reason. The same is said of things that aren't alive, ideas, feelings, all of these require purpose as much as men and women. Love serves a purpose, joy serves a purpose, anger serves a purpose, and hate serves a purpose. Simultaneously, the Sith function as a foil to the Jedi, a complement, an opposite, and their existence is meant to help the galaxy as a whole. There are bigger considerations than lives, as you know already. Sometimes you sacrifice in order to save others. Sometimes it is the sacrifice itself that is the whole point. Without a period of imperialism, the galaxy would die. There was nothing I could have done, save move this period up or down, and because of things other spirits of done and time periods others have booked, I was not able to touch this aspect of history. But I did all I could, Master, and you are alive, and when you are where I am, you realize that death is not so great a loss so long as it does not interfere with the birth of more souls."

"In that case, you could have allowed me to die."

"Master, normally people become one with the Force. They don't just disappear."

"I mean," Obi-Wan shook his head, "I could have joined the others. In the Purge."

Anakin folded his fingers together. "Well," He said honestly, "I wanted you for Luke, and I wanted Luke for you."

It was strange, Obi-Wan decided, how much sense the whole tale made. The Force around them drifted, ambient, reflecting on past timelines, spirits moving back and forth to change things and modify them until the best possible outcome came through. He thought of the relationship he had with his padawan, one that was less close and brotherly than perhaps the young man had wanted, but somehow everything hurt less when he takes into account that an Anakin who loved him and strove to protect him had orchestrated everything so he would still be around in the end. He wanted Obi-Wan around so much that he was willing to sacrifice years with his own mother for his sake.

"So," Anakin broke into his thoughts _again_, "Take Luke."

"Are you sure?"

"I've only been telling you this for…forever. Look, if you don't take Luke I'll get really angry."

"You're in the Force, you're not supposed to be angry."

"Just watch me, Obi-Wan."

"What if I don't like Luke?"

"Well…I wouldn't blame you, since he's a kid. Kids are horrible. But I'll still keep nagging until you take him. You have no _clue _how hard it was not to have Yoda stationed here and you on Dagobah."

"…Why would I want to go to Dagobah?"

"Yes, see, now try to imagine how I was able to convince _Yoda_ to go instead of you, when he's the Grand Master and most capable of beating away the Emperor and his right hand if they ever come knocking, and Vader is specifically looking for _you _all this time. Dagobah's not exactly the first place people look, you know. Just because Tatooine really sucks doesn't mean there was no chance I'd come back here. But Dagobah? It doesn't get more random than that."

"Hm."

"Obi-Wan," Anakin sighed then, "This _Darsant Avat _is still eating away at you. You just don't know it, and you don't feel it, because it hasn't crossed the threshold. That doesn't mean it isn't there. Life alone in a desert is…harsh. While you're strong enough to withstand it until your timed end, it's just nicer to have someone with you."

"Luke is a child. He can't take care of me."

"Sometimes taking care of others _is _them taking care of you. You once told me that the reason you were able to cope with Qui-Gon's death was because you had me and I was there for you."

"Was this in another lifetime?"

"No, it was this lifetime. You were drunk. Garen Muln did a number on you."

Obi-Wan paled. He uttered a Huttese curse. "Was this when you were thirteen?" No wonder that entire week Anakin had been on his best behavior. Of course, someone like Anakin could never behave himself for long, but Obi-Wan had always wondered…he knew there was something embarrassing he did that night. Not that this was the worst scenario, but the issue had bugged him for years. "You imp."

"Yes, and please don't swear like that in front of my son. I'd like Luke to grow up to be a gentleman so he can communicate with his royal sister properly."

"I'm only this way because of you, you know."

Anakin laughed, and Obi-Wan caught himself doing the same. How odd. That heavy weight over his heart had lifted. He looked at the ghost and could actually believe that this was Anakin and not some hopeful hallucination, despite the lingering shadow of Vader in the distant parts of the galaxy.

"How did you change things?" He asked after a moment. "Did you make sure Qui-Gon refused me as a padawan?"

"Yes," Anakin nodded, "I was the one who gave him Xanatos. I whispered to him that Xanatos was destined to be his padawan. In the first timeline, he was Palpatine's first apprentice. Qui-Gon was _really _mad at me about that. Said I cheated him out of a better relationship with you."

"We were fine…"

"Right. After many years of misunderstandings. You have to understand, he and you the first time around, all the Jedi thought their maverick was over the top. You were his son in everything but blood. He even went and called you his son whenever he could get away with it. He was honestly so happy to have you as his padawan; he would often annoy all the other masters because he was gloating about how he got you and they didn't. It's actually really funny and also really sad, like, pathetic sad, really, how silly he acted, but it was adorable, and I tell you…describing Qui-Gon Jinn as adorable is just…wrong. Ugh," The ghost shuddered, "That will give me the chills for a while. No telling how long, since I'm a ghost, but there you go. Anyway, it was because of this profound bond that he practically shared the Unifying Force with you. You two were absolutely ridiculous. You had a better sense of humor the first time too, because you weren't constantly cowed by your master and beating yourself up over things that weren't your fault. Honestly, I'm pretty amazed that Melida-Daan even happened this time around. Shows that your spirit is stronger than your fear." He nodded approvingly.

Obi-Wan swallowed. "Cerasi…"

"Would have died either way. I got her wiped in one version, interestingly enough. She wasn't really my main concern."

"But a lot of things would have been different."

"Yes, yes they would. But you're stuck with this one now, and even though Qui-Gon is mad at me, he's pretty happy with how things are too. You don't know what it was like not having you around. You touched the lives of many people, Master, and life is…just one millisecond in the time that is the Force."

Obi-Wan did not know what to say to this.

"If you're here," He asked at last, "And Vader is also here…how does that work?"

"Heh," Anakin smirked a little, "I'm actually not sure how to explain this in a way that you would understand. Suffice to say that when one's perception of time isn't linear…it changes a lot of things. Many rules that you are use to, that you take for granted, they don't apply to me. But we _are _existing in the same timeframe. You and your spiritual self," This time he grinned, very widely, "Are also existing in the same timeframe. I just wanted to meddle again. Take Luke. Seriously. I promise you won't regret it. His ghost is constantly wondering what in the galaxy all of us are talking about whenever Qui-Gon and I talk about you as a master. It's only fair that you show him yourself."

He knelt in front of Obi-Wan, his figure glowing blue and soft. "You never failed anyone, Master. Not Qui-Gon Jinn, not the Jedi Order, and certainly not me. We all have our paths to walk, and the galaxy must have its ups and downs and we just have to ride through it. But this lonely exile of yours, it's not something I wanted. I cannot take care of you myself, so the only way I can do that is give you my son and let him do so in my place. I will love you through him, I will cherish you through him, and when you finally join us in the Force, you won't have so many years of forsaken abandonment in your memory." He bowed his head. "What you have done for me, no matter which lifetime, it was the goodness of your heart that always prevailed, your spirit, your courage, and the debt I owe you, spirit or no, is something I can never repay in full, no matter how eternal the Force or the galaxy is. But you have to let me try. Let me give you Luke. Let me give you a family to ease your days on Tatooine. Let me give you the most precious thing to me. Allow me this, Master."

The sands continued to thump against the walls, but Obi-Wan's mind was far away. He was recalling the last time his master had hugged him in this lifetime. It was after he put Obi-Wan up for the trials to conveniently make a place for Anakin Skywalker. He remembered that the hug was…longer, than the other hugs in the past. Qui-Gon had been sad to let him go, yet willing because he honestly believed Obi-Wan had been ready. Later on, Obi-Wan had felt a similar sense of loss when Anakin was allowed to take his own trials. There was a sense of fulfillment, of purpose, of wealth in one's life when one had someone to teach, to guide, and in many ways, to depend on and to trust. Luke was not meant to be a burden. His father was here to ensure that. The child was meant to be a…gift. A gift from a soul desperate to make amends and to demonstrate his devotion to someone he loved dearly.

Perhaps Obi-Wan was getting old, but it felt nice to be loved.

"Alright," He finally agreed, and was slightly surprised to find that Anakin had disappeared because the spirit's presence lingered around him like a blanket, warm and affectionate and protecting.


	8. Epilogue

Filial Piety

Epilogue

Mornings usually found one or the other occupant of the tiny hut awake, but never both. Either Obi-Wan was up early, meditating before cooking breakfast and then using the Force to nudge his sleeping charge, or the youth was up earlier, tinkering with his…droid.

"I have a strong sense of deja vu about this," Qui-Gon murmured as there was a few beeps and creaks followed by a spark and an ominous fizzing noise.

"Funny," Obi-Wan groaned as he rolled over on his bed, "I thought everything would feel like a deja vu for you."

"That is true," The ghost conceded.

There was a popping noise, followed by silence.

"You were never such a handful," Qui-Gon observed, "In any lifetime. I have to say, whichever reality, I never envied you for having to train Anakin."

"Why do you have to say that out loud?" Obi-Wan groaned, "You know he can just come and view this time period and then he'll start whining to me about it."

There was another pop, and something shattered. There was a muffled Huttese curse.

"I think it's time for you to get up," Qui-Gon suggested.

The day was not even light yet. Obi-Wan sat up with a scowl, an acerbic comment ready at his lips, but the ghost was no longer there.

Ten minutes later, Obi-Wan was fully awake, the suns still did not rise yet and Luke was sitting next to his fried droid, looking miserable.

"What was so important that you couldn't wait until the suns are up, hm?" Obi-Wan asked as he cooked breakfast. "Did you get any sleep at all last night?"

"I so did," The teen muttered, "But I had this thought about the wiring and I didn't want to lose it. This sucks."

Obi-Wan hid a fond smile. "You probably wouldn't have killed your droid if you actually waited for dawn."

"Argh…"

About two hours later, Anakin materialized, looking grumpy. Luke was not trained enough to see him yet, which meant Obi-Wan would have to tolerate his whining without retorts while trying his best to teach Luke his calculus.

"You know, I actually wanted Qui-Gon to train me in this lifetime!"

_You could have altered the timeline to reflect that._

"It's so unfair that he's always remarking on how annoying I am when I use to look up to him as a kid! It wasn't like he had been the paragon of all padawans himself—He's doing it wrong," Anakin looked over Luke's shoulder. "He's forgetting the minus sign."

Obi-Wan glared at him.

"Right," Anakin raised his hands up, and then went back to complaining, "You know he's always remonstrating me for being a nuisance in life? It's not like I can do anything about it once I'm in the Force. He wouldn't stop giving me an earful about the whole Darth Vader thing! As if there was anything I could have done about _that_! He's just trying to get back at me for stuffing Xanatos on him without seeking his permission first. You'd think after all this time he'd get over it—"

He rattled on for a while, Obi-Wan only half listening. Later, as Luke finished his last practice problem, his older self materialized in the room next to his father. This was the part that always had Obi-Wan extremely confused. He understood that ghosts tend to disappear because they kept track of many timepoints at once, and whenever their attention is diverted they would leave, but it was hard to reconcile the knowledge that a future Luke Skywalker might be keeping track of a period when he was alive with the idea that Obi-Wan would be dealing with a ghost of his still living charge who possessed the memories of multiple timelines, including the first one.

"Hi Ben," Said older Luke, "Sorry, I'm looking for Leia." He disappeared.

Anakin and Obi-Wan stared at the place he had left.

"Insolent brat," Anakin moped, "Not even a greeting for his father."

Since Luke was still present, Obi-Wan could not comment out loud.

_Don't you have ghost things to do?_

"I can't wait for _Darsant Avat _again," Said Anakin, "Time for it to go in reverse. Dark Side is useful and all, but it shouldn't last too long. It's like candy. Good stuff, in small amounts. Too bad it's not going to happen for another five or so years. I'm also really sick of how long I had to wear that suit. In the first timeline, I didn't need a suit. Palpatine's sick idea of bringing everything to Mustafar. Out of all the freaking uninhabited planets why the Force did he choose Mustafar?"

"Done," Luke announced, pushing the flimsy over to Obi-Wan for his review. The boy sat back and stretched. "Can we go to Mos Eisley today?"

"To fix your droid?" Obi-Wan asked as he read over the logic.

"Well…yeah. Also there's a holomovie showing in the theaters that I want to watch with you. I think you'd like it. There's this old hermit guy that is all wise and everything, trying to guide this obnoxious, snobby teenage kid who then gets him into situations even his wisdom couldn't avoid."

Anakin snorted.

Obi-Wan looked at Luke from the corner of his eyes.

"It's a comedy."

"I gathered that. I think you'd be happier watching it with your friends."

"It's been years since we watched a holomovie together, Ben."

"How does this movie end?"

"I don't know. Come on, can we go? There's no sandstorm due today. If we go early we can duck inside the theater when it's the hottest and come out when it's cooler."

"The movie's not going to be six hours long."

"Well we'll do something else."

"You just want to try using the Force techniques you learned yesterday on everyone there."

Anakin burst out laughing at this.

"Please? I'll be careful."

Once upon a time, Obi-Wan would have been much more cautious. Ever since being in contact with Qui-Gon, Siri, Tahl, Anakin, Luke and even Leia, and learning that _Darsant Avat_ was in fact supposed to work with Luke, he had been more lax. Still, he was supposed to be vigilant.

"If you bring Darth Vader down on us he's going to torture me until I die."

Obi-Wan rarely brought up Darth Vader, especially when Anakin was not around. Having the ghost sit at his kitchen table did much to put his reality in perspective. Luke, who did not know the whole story, looked properly appalled at the thought of putting Obi-Wan in danger, though given that he was a teenager it could also be because he was upset that Obi-Wan was underestimating his stealth.

"I won't get caught! There are always tremors in the Force, and Vader hates Tatooine. Besides, we're always practicing out here."

"Where no one sees, and where I used the Force to shield you from detection."

"Then you can shield me when we're at Mos Eisley. Come on, it's been a while since we hung out over there." There was actually a genuine honesty to this last comment, but it was a little diluted by the fact that Luke actually wanted Obi-Wan there to test his Force technique and had been under strict orders not to practice without supervision, because his shields were a bit pathetic. Of the twins, according to Anakin, Leia had always been the one who was better with masking her presence in the Force.

Luke should have been too old for the puppy face he made, and indeed it looked odd on his countenance, quickly shaping up to look like a man, but it was hilarious enough that Obi-Wan could not keep his composure.

"Fine," He glanced back at Luke's final answer, pleased with the correct solution, "We'll go to Mos Eisley. I'll pretend to be the old cryptic, grumpy lunatic who lives in the desert and you'll regret taking me along."

"You'll _pretend?_"

Obi-Wan swatted him on the back of the head.

Anakin disappeared for a minute before returning. "Apparently the hermit in the holomovie is a rodian midget and his mentee is a nautolan giant. At least they got the heights right." He disappeared before Obi-Wan could articulate the proper retort.

_Ghosts are strange and infuriating._

Luke ran outside to prepare the speeder. It was already very hot, though not the hottest the day would get.

"Uncle Owen!" The boy called out cheerfully. "Hey, how are you?"

The Lars couple had not been too eager to part with their nephew, but Obi-Wan had the help of Luke's father, as well as Luke himself. The boy had latched onto Obi-Wan on sight and cried inconsolably whenever Beru tried to part him from the Jedi. That did not mean the Lars couple had been happy about the changed arrangement, so to appease them and keep Luke in touch with his family, Obi-Wan would often escort Luke to his aunt and uncle every afternoon and sometimes for the whole day after his homeschooling was over. As Luke reached adolescence, he started flying himself over there, keeping to Obi-Wan's established curfew hours in order to dodge raiders. As a result, Owen and Beru rarely visited Obi-Wan, even if the animosity between them died a long time ago.

"Is Ben inside?"

"Yeah, we're going to Mos Eisley."

"Great. I have to talk to him."

Luke blinked at this as his uncle walked past, obviously wondering if this was a long talk or a short talk. Owen did not clarify, instead pushing the door open to poke his head inside. "Kenobi?"

"Sir," Obi-Wan greeted, wiping at his face when the wind blew some sand inside, "What can I do for you?"

Owen stepped inside. Behind him rolled a familiar-looking R2 unit.

"Oh hey look at that," Anakin materialized into existence next to the Jedi, looking far happier than usual, which was saying a lot because as a Force ghost he was always at least content. "They're early."

_Anakin,_ Obi-Wan thought hard; he was not sure if the ghost could hear his thoughts since Anakin sometimes acted like he could and sometimes acted like he could not, but it was better than talking out loud and looking even more like a lunatic in front of Owen—_Would you _please _stop talking to me when my sanity's reputation can be compromised?_

True to form, the imp did not react at all. "I wonder if Threepio's here too. This might mean that things sped up a little all because you took Luke in."

"There's a holomessage on there that I think you should take a look at," Owen informed Obi-Wan.

Luke eventually came inside and stopped right next to his father's ghost as the old Jedi played the message from Leia Organa.

"Why do holograms always make people look fat?" Anakin complained. "Her white robes don't help matters much."

_Was that why you always wore black?_ Obi-Wan tried not to look at his old padawan as he recalled the robes Anakin use to wear back when he was the vain Hero with No Fear.

"She's beautiful!" Luke gasped in awe, which made Anakin turn his head to give his son a worried look.

"If you have somewhere to go," Owen told Obi-Wan, "Beru and I can take Luke until you return."

Luke gave his uncle a look of distaste. "I'd like that, though I also want to point out that I'm kind of old enough to stay at home by myself."

"No he's not," Said Anakin, so excited that his aura was almost blinding, "He'd burn down your hut trying to make soup. It will be a disaster. Not that this matters, because it's probably time for him to meet his sister. You're going to tell him that really soon, right? Because I really don't want to see my son and daughter kiss each other just to spite that cocksure smuggler. I find that really amusing, but Padmé would make my afterlife really miserable and she's going to keep a close eye on that time period this time around. Speaking of which," He suddenly disappeared, presumably to talk to his wife.

"I think it's time," Was all Obi-Wan said out loud. Owen's face tightened at this.

"Time for what?" Luke asked, looking worried. "We're not going to see a holomovie today are we? Are we going to help that girl?"

"Luke, go pack your things. I imagine we won't be seeing this hut for a while." _Ever._

"Thank you for bringing me the message, sir," Obi-Wan said to Owen.

Owen nodded. "I imagine you will need the droids?"

"Droids?" Obi-Wan looked out and sure enough, C3P0 was outside, hobbling in the sand. "Yes, we'll need the droids. Thank you again."

"No problem. Take care of yourself…Kenobi."

Obi-Wan nodded at him. "You too, Lars."

Later, Luke flew the landspeeder while Obi-Wan sat in the passenger's seat.

"We're not coming back home again are we?" Luke asked, as the landscape sped past.

"Probably not. I cannot say for sure. Is that alright?"

"Sure," Luke grinned cheerfully at him, "I mean, I might miss it, but for some reason I don't mind right now. We're going to have adventures together; that beats that hovel anyday."

"A Jedi does not seek adventure," Obi-Wan said dryly. _And that was _my _hovel you just insulted._

"This is going to be wizard," Luke went on, and Obi-Wan was reminded of a nine-year-old Anakin and his first time seeing the living quarters of the temple, "You, me, the last two Jedi in the galaxy, off to save a pretty girl."

Luke had inherited his father's sense of mischief.

"Settle down," Obi-Wan said, "She's your sister."

There was a moment of silence.

"Darn it," Luke slapped the steering bars, "I _knew _you would say that. It just figured that a pretty girl like that turns out to be my sister. So her name's Leia Organa, huh? And she's a princess?" He paused again. "You told me I wouldn't know who my sister is until the time came for us to face the Sith. Does that mean we're going to confront Vader and Sidious soon?" He sounded anxious all of the sudden. "I don't think I'm ready."

"No, you're not," Obi-Wan agreed soothingly, "But you will be, as will she."

Luke was easily consoled. "This sucks. She gets to live in a palace on what's the place, Alderaan? And when I meet her she's going to think I'm such a lunatic and it's all because I live with Crazy Old Ben."

"Brat," Obi-Wan drawled, "I raise you for how many years and this is what I get in return. Impertinence."

"It's your fault," Luke grinned cheekily at him, "I'm the fruit of your efforts."

"Oh Force," But Obi-Wan could not help laughing. "I blame your father for this."

Luke made a face at him, but then settled again. "Are you going to be alright, facing Vader?"

His genuine concern was heartwarming. Obi-Wan thought of the years of pestering the ghost of Anakin Skywalker had committed to up till now, in an effort to remind Obi-Wan that Vader was Vader and Anakin was Anakin. '_I'm right here! Stop thinking about Vader! Vader sucks, all that's good about him is his awesome voice and that was due to his vocalizer, and he doesn't have any hair. Shut up I know he's me.'_ "I'll be fine. Our first task is to help your sister. All the rest will follow as the Force wills."

Luke grinned again. "Wizard."

It was touching, how content the boy was with the idea of facing a great evil with his guardian at his side. Anakin had hinted that Obi-Wan would not survive the encounter with Vader, and for a moment the old Jedi debated warning Luke of their coming separation. He knew Luke would be hurt terribly by his death, possibly more so in this lifetime than in others, but decided ultimately that warning him of the future would not lessen the pain. Let the boy remain blissfully ignorant for now.

Still, perhaps Obi-Wan had grown soft over the years, losing some of the Jedi rigidity he had developed when the Order was still intact. Some words needed to be said as long as there was time to say them. He rested a hand on the boy's shoulder. "I love you, Padawan."

Luke tensed and gave him an alarmed look, sensing more to his words than a simple declaration of affection. Obi-Wan gazed back casually, not revealing any hints.

"Love you too, Ben," The teen blinked. "Everything's going to be alright, right? You didn't have a vision of some sort?"

The old Jedi chuckled. "No. No vision. Just the knowledge that there will be many changes in the near future, and I wanted you to know that before we face them."

"Alright," Luke accepted this. As Mos Eisley loomed in the distance, the youth reached one hand down to grasp his lightsaber briefly—it was his father's lightsaber. He returned his hand to the steering bars as he promised, "I won't let Vader hurt you again."

_No,_ Obi-Wan thought as he smiled and closed his eyes, waiting to reach their destination, _No. Vader cannot hurt me again._

Anakin had described the aridness of Tatooine in great detail, clarifying with no uncertain terms his sheer distaste for the planet. For Obi-Wan, Tatooine had been the place he learned the full truth of his life and everything that happened in it. It was far from simply an empty, dry wasteland_—_it was a place where Obi-Wan had purged the ghosts of his past, his guilt and regret, and found joy, love, and purpose in a world briefly in turmoil. A place where Anakin had been innocent and young, untarnished by the Dark Side, or the stress and fears of war; a place where Luke had grown and matured from a child to a man. A place Obi-Wan received both a parting gift from Qui-Gon and a parting gift from Anakin. When they finally reached the marketplace, Luke and Obi-Wan stepped out of the speeder, and the old Jedi could not resist pulling Luke to a one-armed hug the way Qui-Gon had done to him long ago, and the way he had to Luke's father.

They were leaving Tatooine. Obi-Wan will miss it.


End file.
